Details: Ping Ru’s mother Mei Hui Yan (b. 1969) was quite neglectful because she was unable to cope with her son. Mei Hui went off with another man to get her mind off of her problems, thus abandoning her only child. Ping Ru has autism.
Ping Ru likes My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, long-sleeved shirts, AVGN, and Hatsune Miku. He doesn’t like loud noises, JonTron, and being bullied by people like Anima.
Ping Ru is an easily excitable and gullible boy. Due to his autism, a lot of people assume that he is mentally retarded and violent. He is not violent; he is very weak as a matter of fact. In a group home like the YouChannell Home, he gets easily overstimulated and has amounts of meltdowns.
One chilly Saturday afternoon, Anima and Piro were huddled together watching a YouTube Poop. The YouTube Poop they were watching was from one of Anima’s favorite YouTube Poopers. The fast-paced editing, seizure-inducing visuals, and ear rapes- she enjoyed all of it. Too bad Cereza and Siënna had to ruin their fun when they walked into the kitchen.
“It’s my turn to use the computer,” Cereza told Anima in a bitchy tone of voice.
“Fuck off, your turn isn’t even until one hour later,” Anima replied back with a tone of voice that was just as bitchy.
“No, I know my turn is right now!” Cereza argued, “Your turn is at twelve o’clock. My turn is at one o’clock. It’s one o’clock, so that means it’s my turn! Now get off!”
“You’re just gonna have to wait until this video is over,” Anima said, not even looking at the two girls standing behind her.
But the two girls didn’t wait. In fact, Siënna looked over Anima’s shoulders and said, “I thought Greg said you weren’t allowed to watch those YouTube Poops anymore.”
Anima scowled and pouted. “It’s not a YouTube Poop. It’s an-“
“Greg!” Siënna called out, “Anima’s watching one of those YouTube Poops again!”
Anima scowled even harder and slid down into her seat. Of course Siënna had to be a fucking snitch as usual. Of course it didn’t help that Greg walked into the kitchen and exited out of the video while she was watching it.
“What the hell was that for?!” Anima yelped.
“Anima, I thought I told you not to watch those videos again,” Greg lectured, “And your internet time was over several minutes ago. Now, get off the computer and find something else to do.”
Anima moaned and groaned and slumped over to the couch where she saw Ryu-jin “reading” a book in that old ass periwinkle recliner.
“Greg banned you from using the internet, too?” Ryu-jin asked, still “reading” his book.
Anima looked up at Ryu-jin with astonishment and slight anger. “How the fuck do you know about that?!”
“Because I heard you,” Ryu-jin answered with a slight smirk on his face.
Anima glared at Ryu-jin with her evilest eye and hissed, “Motherfucker!” She slid down even further on the tacky orange couch and scowled her meanest scowl. It wasn’t fair; none of this was fair! How come she wasn’t allowed to watch YouTube Poops on the internet?! Most of them weren’t even that naughty! And if this wasn’t unfair enough, Cereza and Siënna began to play this shit:
“What the hell?!” Ryu-jin exclaimed, throwing his book down on the floor, “I can’t watch Smosh videos or listen to Rucka Rucka Ali songs, but these two can listen to this shit?! That’s not fair!”
“These two” heard Ryu-jin’s complaint because Cereza shouted out, “Yeah, well, it’s in a foreign language, so that means it’s okay!”
“Okay my ass!” Ryu-jin argued, “This song’s about some bitch murdering somebody! And you guys get onto my ass for watching inappropriate shit on YouTube! I’m telling!” But before Ryu-jin could jump out of the recliner and snitch to Greg, Anima grabbed his wrist and slapped him across the face.
“Don’t stoop to their level,” Anima whispered in his ear, “They’re just gonna find another way to snitch on us.”
Ryu-jin heaved a gusty sigh and plopped back down on the recliner with Anima plopping back down on the couch, where they both sat there, lifeless like empty, plastic bags, until they heard the downstairs bathroom’s door opened and they heard Minha singing Gwen Stefani’s “Hollaback Girl” to herself as she danced towards her room to get dressed for a babysitting job at the Manalos’ house.
“Let me hear you say this shit is bananas- B-A-N-A-N-A-S,” Minha sang quietly as she shimmied into her room.
Seeing his sister sing the bananas song gave Ryu-jin a wonderful idea.
Ryu-jin and Anima laughed their asses off, which made Minha blush, twitch her eye, and clench her fists some more.
“I’m going to fucking kill you, Ryu-jin!” Minha screeched at the top of your lungs. She chased Ryu-jin and Anima all over the house, only stopping when the two assholes ran outside into the front yard because she was just wearing a towel.
“Oh, God! That was a good one!” Anima wheezed from laughter as she leaned onto the white two-story house.
“Yeah!” Ryu-jin added, falling down onto the cold grass.
When the two dopes finally calmed the fuck down, Anima looked over at Ryu-jin and asked, “How the fuck are you able to do all of that with one little quote?”
Ryu-jin shrugged and answered with a smug smirk on his face, “What can I say? It’s pretty easy to piss Minha off.”
Well, that wasn’t a very clear answer. Anima and Ryu-jin sat silently in the grass for a few minutes until they heard Marcus and Axel arguing about something stupid. When they sneaked over to the brown, wooden fence, they discovered the boys playing association football.
“No, Axel. You’re supposed to catch the ball with your hands, not kick the ball back to me!” Marcus exclaimed, sweating like a pig on a hot summer day.
“Okay, well, I’m sorry for not knowing about whatever sports shit you seem to be obsessed with!” Axel argued.
“Don’t they show sports in those stupid teen dramas you seem to like for some reason?” Marcus asked condescendingly.
Anima and Ryu-jin looked at each other and smiled mischievously. Looked like some serious shit was about to go down!
“What’s going on?” Ryu-jin asked the boys as he and Anima hopped into the backyard.
“Axel keeps screwing up at being the goalie in football!” Marcus whined like a little bitch.
“Hey, maybe if you weren’t such a shitty teacher, I would’ve done better!” Axel argued with his hands on his hips.
“Oh, my God, Axel! A teacher is what a person is at school! A coach is what a person is outside when you’re playing sports!” Marcus argued back, “How do you not know all of this?! Don’t they have coaches in those crappy teen dramas you like to watch?!”
“Wait, a minute!” Ryu-jin said, looking at Axel, “You’ve never played or even heard of fucking football before?!” The smile on his face quivered as he tried hard not to laugh but ultimately failing.
Anima fell down onto the ground and laughed her ass off. “Oh, holy shit! This is just fucking rich!” she barely wheezed out.
Axel clenched his fists and exclaimed, with his voice cracking, “Alright, assholes. I want to see some of you do better!”
Ryu-jin stepped forward. “Okay, fair enough.” He took his place as the goalie, bent over to catch the ball Marcus was gonna kick, and WHAM… he missed and fell down onto his ass.
“Yeah, and you say that I’m a shit goalie,” Axel mumbled at Ryu-jin, rolling his eyes.
“Hey, at least I knew what the hell I was doing!” Ryu-jin argued.
Anima just kept on laughing, holding her sides as if they were about to explode at any second. “Jesus, you’re about as coordinated as your sister, man!” she wheezed, “At least she has a nice ass to back it up.”
“Hey, don’t talk about my sister like that!” Ryu-jin said, his face blushing.
“What?! It’s true!” Anima argued, “She does kind of have a nice ass.”
“Don’t talk about my sister like that!” Ryu-jin shouted, his face a bright red.
“Well, it’s true!” Anima said.
She and Ryu-jin bickered about Minha for a few minutes until Marcus exclaimed, “Aw, that cat over there is so cute!”
Everyone stopped what they were doing and watched a orange and white tabby cat strolling around the neighborhood without a single care in the world.
“You know, my homeroom teacher, Mrs. Brenner, showed me this funny video of a cat playing a piano, and that cat kind of reminds of the cat in the video,” Marcus said. He took out his phone and showed a funny video of a cat playing a song on a piano.
“Looks trite,” Anima said at the end of the video like a bitch.
“Oh, and I bet you can find a funnier video than that?” Marcus inquired.
“Yeah, actually. I can,” Anima answered condescendingly with her hands on her hips.
“Is it gonna be another cat video?” Axel asked in a bored tone of voice.
Yes, actually. It was yet another cat video on YouTube.
“I don’t get it!” Marcus whined at the end of video like a little bitch.
“What the hell kind of video was that?!” Axel questioned.
But Anima didn’t answer either of their comments because she was too busy staring at the pictures on Marcus’s phone, which included a steamy photo of Amy Adams.
“Hey, eh… Marcus. What the hell is this?” Anima asked with her lips quivering into a smile.
“What are you talking about?” Marcus asked. And then he saw what Anima was staring at. “Give me my phone back, Anima!” he cried, trying to snatch his phone out of her hands.
“Damn, Marcus! I didn’t know you were into ginger girls!” Anima wheezed in laughter, falling down to the ground again.
“Wait, Marcus’s into ginger girls?” Ryu-jin asked. He snatched the phone out of Anima’s hand and messed around in the gallery. He immediately started wheezing in laughter, too. “Holy shit!” he shouted, showing Anima another photo of a ginger girl.
“Who the fuck is this?” Anima asked, her lips quivering even faster than a talking blue hedgehog.
“She looks a little young,” Ryu-jin said. He looked up at Marcus and said, “Dude, I didn’t know you were into ginger girls!”
“I am not!” Marcus shouted, “Now, give me my phone back right now!” He tried to grab his phone out of Ryu-jin’s hand, but they ended up playing tug-of-war with it instead. Meanwhile, Axel, who had been watching the drama unfold this entire time, looked over at the picture showing on Marcus’s phone.
“I think I saw her on a season of America’s Next Top Model,” Axel remarked, “Man, that show’s overrated.”
Marcus rolled his eyes. “Yeah, whatever,” he grumbled, finally grabbing his phone out of Ryu-jin’s hands and exiting out of the picture.
But Axel wasn’t done looking at it. “Is that Amy Adams?” he asked.
Marcus blushed a bright red. “Y-Yeah, it is,” he answered in a stutter, “Why do you ask that?”
“Dude, she’s not a natural ginger,” Axel broke the news.
“Wait, she’s not?!” Marcus exclaimed, his voice cracking.
“She’s strawberry blonde. She’s got my hair color,” Axel added.
“Oh, my God…” Marcus held his phone as if he was holding his dead baby. Amy Adams wasn’t a real ginger, yet she looked so real! Had he been lied to this entire time?!
“Well, at least we all know Marcus’s into ginger girls,” Anima remarked, leaning against a tree.
Ryu-jin laughed. “Who wants to bet five bucks that he’s got a crush on Riley or Ami?”
“I do not!” Marcus shouted, steam practically pouring out of his ears as he clenched his fists. He glared at Ryu-jin and asked what kind of girls he was into.
“I don’t really care much. As long as she’s got big tits and a big ass, then it’s all fine by me,” Ryu-jin answered with a slight smile on his face.
“Hey, that kind of sounds like your sister,” Anima commented, sitting on the grass and messing with her shoes.
“Dude, don’t talk about my sister like that!” Ryu-jin yelled, his face turning red.
“Well, it’s true! She does have big tits and a big ass,” Anima said, “I’m surprised you two haven’t hooked up yet.”
Axel snorted in the background, which made Ryu-jin’s face turn even redder. “I can hear you snickering in the background, asshole!” he said, quickly turning his head, “Are you into any type of girl?”
“No,” Axel answered.
This time, it was Ryu-jin’s turn to snicker. “Oh, wow. I didn’t know you were gay!” he chuckled.
“I’m not,” Axel said flatly.
“Wait, I’m confused,” Marcus said, “You’re not into any type of girls, but you’re not gay. Are you not into girls or not gay? Which is it?”
“Both,” Axel answered with an exasperated look on his face.
“How could you be both?!” Ryu-jin questioned, “How can you not be gay and not like girls at the same time?!”
“I just am. Why the fuck is that so hard for you to comprehend?” Axel answered, rolling his eyes.
“Alright, you know what?” Ryu-jin announced, “This is it. We are going to show you videos of hot girls and/or guys to see what you like!”
“I already know how I feel about guys,” Axel said, “I see myself naked every time I use the shower.”
“Alright, fine,” Ryu-jin exhaled, “We’ll show you videos of hot girls then.” He snatched his phone out of Marcus’s hands and tried to go onto to the one website where there were tons of hot girls- PornHub. Too bad for PornHub because, like many other porn sites, it was blocked in the YouChannell Home.
“Well, this is just fucking great!” Ryu-jin griped, “Anyone know where we can get access to this site?”
Anima thought for a while, then immediately came to a conclusion. “We can go to my friend River’s house right across the street,” she suggested.
That sounded like a good idea… until they actually arrived at River’s house.
“I don’t know, guys,” Marcus said with his eyebrows furrowed in worry, “I think we might be trespassing.”
“Don’t worry, it’s not trespassing if you’re at your friend’s house,” Anima reassured him. She balled her fingers into a fist and banged it on the ivory white door. “River!” she called out, “Is it okay if we use your internet? Ours is down right now!”
There were no answers. The whole place was dead silent.
“Hey, River! Aren’t you gonna answer?! Hello, can we use your internet?! Ours is down right now!” Anima shouted, banging her fist on the door.
Axel tugged at Anima’s shirt. “I don’t think anyone’s home,” he pointed out.
Anima looked around. Sure enough, there was no car in the driveway, and every light in the house was off. “Damn it!”
“Alright, genius. Where you suggest we go to next?” Ryu-jin asked in a exasperated tone of voice.
Anima thought and thought about that question, her finger stroking her chin. She was pretty sure Amanda was home and had plenty of internet at her house. The problem was that her three-year-old sister Leila would probably catch them watching something inappropriate, and Amanda probably wouldn’t let them watch something like that either. So, the only place left was-
“Hurry it up!” Axel exclaimed impatiently.
“I will take my sweet ass time making my decision!” Anima yelled at him, her fists clenched even tighter.
So, the only place left was Lidiya’s house. After all, her dad wasn’t too anal about what was on her internet history, and nobody would bother them otherwise. So, that was the place Anima took her fellow comrades.
“Hey, Lidiya,” Anima began when Lidiya answered her door, “Is it okay if we use your internet while we’re here? Ours is down right now.”
Lidiya tilted her head. “What do you need our internet for?” she asked.
Shit, they actually needed a reason. “We… We just need to work on some school stuff,” Anima answered as casually as she could.
Lidiya nodded and crossed her arms across her chest. “Uh-huh, and who are these guys?”
Damn it! “They’re just some school partners. They’re only here for a project.”
Lidiya sighed, but let them in. “Just don’t take too long, okay? And make sure you use the computer in the kitchen.”
Anima turned to the boys and smiled. Finally, they had unlimited access to the internet! Time to access PornHub!
“What the hell is wrong with you guys?!” Axel exclaimed as soon as Anima clicked on the first video, which was lesbian porn, “This is fucking disgusting!”
“Alright, we found out Axel’s gay!” Ryu-jin said, searching up some gay porn and clicking on the first video. “Is this better for you, Axel?”
“No, this is just as gross!” Axel answered, his face turning red, “You people are fucking disgusting!”
“Jesus Christ, kid! Keep your voice down!” Anima commanded in a hushed whisper, “How do you think Lidiya is gonna feel when she finds out I’ve been lying to her?!”
“Maybe you shouldn’t have lied to her in the first place!” Axel argued.
“He’s got a point,” Marcus said, “Lying is one of the worst things you could do.”
“Shut the fuck up, Marcus!” Anima shouted at him.
And as if things couldn’t get any worse, Lidiya’s little stepbrother Akira walked into the kitchen and saw the entire thing unfold- yes, that included the video. “Hey, that video’s got naked men in it!” he shouted at the top of his lungs.
“It’s got what?!” Lidiya hollered from her room. She zipped downstairs into the kitchen and shouted, “What the hell, Anima?! Have you been lying to me this entire time?!”
“Look, Lidiya. I can explain,” Anima said, holding her hands up against her chest.
But she didn’t have a chance because Mr. Yoshida, who looked a lot like like Akira except taller with longer hair and scabs on his face, walked into the kitchen and asked, “What the hell is going on here-” And then he saw the video that was playing on the computer.
“What the fuck is wrong with you people?!” Mr. Yoshida shouted, “There are children here!”
“Yes, I agree with him!” Lidiya added, her face as red as a tomato, “Now get the hell out of my house, and you stay out!”
Needless to say, the mission was a failure.
“Well, at least we know what Axel is,” Ryu-jin stated as the gang walked back home.
“Yeah, but I still don’t get it,” Marcus said, “How could somebody not like girls or boys in that way? I mean, isn’t that part important for having a partner and making babies?”
Axel rolled his eyes. “Whatever, you guys are fucking weird,” he grumbled, storming away from these weird freaks.
As the trio continued walking home from Lidiya’s house, Anima muttered under her breath, “I can’t believe you guys clicked away from the first video. You’re all a bunch of assholes.”
Too bad Ryu-jin and Marcus heard that.
“Why are you so upset about us clicking away from the first video? I thought this whole thing was about finding out what Axel is,” Ryu-jin said.
“Yeah, why are you so interested in that first video anyway?” Marcus asked.
Anima lowered her head and walked away from the two boys. She couldn’t tell them the reason why, especially since she still remembered what Penelope had said to her two months ago.
Penelope sniffled and said, “Remember this afternoon when Christian Seger called us faggots, lezbos, and dykes?”
Oh… that. “Yeah, why?”
“He’s not the only thing that thinks like that,” Penelope explained, “Lots of people think that, too.”
No, she couldn’t tell them. They probably wouldn’t understand anyway…
“God, I can’t wait until we finally start high school!” Lidiya grouched as she and her friends walked home from school one cloudy, chilly afternoon.
“Tell me about it!” Kishi added, rolling her eyes in exasperation.
“Aw, I’m gonna miss you guys when you get there next year,” Amanda told them in a somewhat whiny voice, throwing herself onto Lidiya and giving her a bear hug.
“Ya’ll realize ya’ll gonna have to take more standardized tests, right?” River told them both in a condescending tone of voice.
Both Lidiya and Kishi slowly turned their heads to glare menacingly at River. What kind of young child wanted to be reminded of standardized testing in high school?! High school was about getting driver’s licenses, looking at college applications, senior skip days, more dances and parties, and overall more freedom! More standardized testing was the exact opposite of what their expectations were!
“Shut up, River,” Lidiya grumbled, quickly turning her head away.
River shrugged and smirked with a sly twinkle in her brown eyes. “Alrightie then. I was just saying,” she said more to herself before shoving her hands into the pockets of her orange school skirt.
The gang continued to walk home in silence until they bumped into a young, voluptuous black woman wearing a black Batman T-shirt and blue jeans that hugged her body and rolling a bright red baby stroller which carried a young black toddler in it. Something about her looked familiar- her careless posing and the child in the stroller- and then something clicked. Was this… was this Leandra Miller?! They haven’t seen her in, like, six months, which might as well have been forever!
“Leandra?!” Kishi exclaimed, quickly stepping back in shock, “What have you been doing this entire time?! We haven’t seen you in forever!”
“I dropped out of school,” Leandra answered with a slight shrug, “Now I’m a stripper.”
Stripper?! That was the most and yet the least surprising statement Leandra had ever said.
“Do you make any money doing all of this?” Kishi asked.
That was when Leandra pulled out a whole wad of twenty-dollar bills out of her jean pockets.
Twenty dollars was a lot of money for an eighth grader, so imagine several wads of twenty-dollar bills being earned all at once. Yeah… that was a lot of money.
“Wait, how can you earn all that money without even going to high school?” Amanda asked in pure awe.
Leandra merely shrugged and answered, “That’s just part of being a stripper.” Then she grabbed her son’s stroller and walked away.
The girls just stood there in complete silence for several minutes before finally walking the rest of their ways back home.
“Damn, this really makes me think twice about high school,” River stated.
Lidiya nodded. “You ever think that if any one of us never goes to high school, we’ll make a whole lot of money like that?” she asked.
“I’ve never really thought about that,” Kishi said, “I’ve always been told that you had to graduate high school and go to college if you wanted to be successful.”
The girls started talking about high school again, which made Anima herself think about high school. Believe it or not, there was one good thing about going to high school- going to the same school as Penelope. Hell, maybe she would be in some of the same classes as Penelope! That would be a dream come true. Speaking of Penelope, where was she? Anima hadn’t seen her in a few days, and she really missed her. Maybe it would be a good idea to wait for Penelope out at the playground near the woods, like she had done for her.
So, after school, Anima walked out right towards the slide on the playground with Piro and Katja, where she waited for Penelope. And wait she did… for moments and moments and moments. The sun barely shined, but she waited on… and waited… and waited… but the only person who even noticed her was Piro.
“Menstrual Man! Menstrual Man!” Piro cried out as he ran up to Anima with a stick in his hands.
Oh, God! “What the fuck do you want?” Anima asked in a groan.
“It’s Jason! Jason… Jason…” Piro’s voice strained for a few more seconds, trying to find words to say, but the only thing he could come up with was, “We gotta stop Jason!”
Anima heaved a gusty sigh. “Look, asshole. I don’t have any time for this shit. I’m trying to meet up with someone. Can you please not bother me?”
Piro looked up at Anima’s face, straight into her eyes, with confusion and disappointment in his own eyes. “B-B-But, Jason-“
“Will you please fucking leave?!” Anima shouted at him.
Piro ran away from Anima with tears running down his face and a sad howl coming out of his mouth. Anima heaved a gusty sigh and slid back under the slide where she waited for Penelope once more. Where the hell was she? It wasn’t that late, and it wasn’t that late either. This was boring- oh, so boring! She kind of regretted telling Piro to fuck off, but if she had been playing with him, she would’ve missed Penelope. Nothing was worse than missing out on Penelope! So, she stayed under the slide and tried to entertain herself the best she could.
“Hey, little boy. Want some candy?” Anima mumbled in a small voice.
“Who are you talking to?” a young woman’s voice asked.
Anima jumped in fear, bumping her head in the process. She looked up to see who that was and blushed a deep maroon when she found out it was-
Steam was pouring out of Anima’s ears when Penelope asked that question again. “N-N-N-Nobody! I wasn’t talking to anyone!”
“Then why were you sounding like a creepy pedophile?” Penelope asked, clearly not impressed with the girl’s answer.
Oh… no! “I wasn’t acting like a creepy pedophile!” Anima exclaimed at the top of her lungs.
“Oh, come on! That’s exactly what a creepy pedophile would say!” Penelope argued.
Damn, that was a good point. Anima crawled out from under the slide to see what Penelope wanted from her in the first place.
“I just wanted to say hello,” Penelope merely said.
Anima’s heart sank. Damn, was that really it? Well, that sucked. “H-Hi.” Was that all Penelope wanted to say to her? “How have eh… how have things been doing for you?”
“Fine,” Penelope answered flatly. The two girls just stood there and stared at each other for what seemed like hours.
“Jesus, this is getting fucking ridiculous!” Anima thought. She took a deep breath and was about to say something when Katja shouted from a distance, “Anima, it’s time to go home now!”
Damn, it was time to go home already?! They had barely even talked to each other! Anima sighed and looked at Penelope’s eyes. “I’ll… I’ll see you soon, okay?”
Penelope nodded. “Yeah, see you soon.” Then she did the strangest thing.
Anima’s entire face burned; she had never had somebody hug her like this before! She had especially never been hugged as a means of comfort or love before. What made Penelope do that? Why would anyone hug her? She was unhuggable, unlovable, un… untouchable. At least, Anima thought she was untouchable. Maybe not. After all, it didn’t stop him from getting his way, did it?
“Anima, I’ve already told you it’s time to go home now!” Katja called out from a distance.
Anima wanted to move her legs and get the hell out of there, but her legs were stuck and too wobbly to pick up. Anima’s breath sped up, and her heart was beating out of her chest. This was not good, this was not good, this was not…
And then, everything went black.
…
“Anima,” Katja’s voice called out from a long distance, “Anima sweetie, are you okay?”
Anima slowly and groggily opened her eyes to see Katja kneeling right beside her bed. “Wha… What happened?” she asked in a moan.
“You passed out after some girl hugged you at the playground,” Katja answered, “Was that girl someone you’re close with?”
Oh no, that dreaded question. Had Katja figured it out; she hoped not. That would be awful! Anima still remembered what Penelope had said on Valentine’s Day.
“Remember this afternoon when Christian Seger called us faggots, lezbos, and dykes?”
“He’s not the only thing that thinks like that. Lots of people think that, too.”
“I just wanna rest for a bit,” Anima groaned turning away from Katja and from the whole world.
“Are you sure?” Katja asked.
Anima nodded, though barely.
“Okay then.” Right before Katja opened the door, she said, “I just want to let you know that dinner will be ready in about ten minutes.”
As soon as the door shut, Anima heaved a shuddered shy. She couldn’t believe someone had come so close to discovering the truth between her and Penelope, and it was Katja of all people! Anima pulled her green blanket over her head and squeezed her eyes shut. She had to be way more careful with her and Penelope; nobody should ever know about their relationship lest they get killed for it.
It was an unusually warm afternoon on the second to last day of March as Anima and Piro sat around the computer in the kitchen, watching old Zelda CD-i YouTube Poops- age-restricted ones loaded with unfunny sex jokes.
“You must have some really awful taste in YouTube Poops,” Anima told Piro, “It’s all nothing but unfunny sex jokes. You know this, right?”
Piro nodded and stared at the screen as if what he was watching was the best video on the entire internet.
“God, it’s not even sentence-mixed well,” Anima muttered to herself.
As soon as the video ended, Piro clicked on the sequel, and as soon as that video began, Siënna and Dante Smith, her friend from school, walked in on them listening to a bunch of dirty, raunchy humor that was not at all suitable for general audiences.
“Hey, those guys are saying a bunch of dirty things,” Dante said, pointing at the computer screen. He looked over at Anima and asked, “What are they even saying?”
“A bunch of sex jokes,” Anima mumbled, “You wouldn’t understand. It’s not even that funny.”
“Sex jokes…?” Dante knew that sex was a dirty thing, but he had never heard the world used in such a blase way. He leaned over and read the title of the video. “What’s a… a YouTube Poop?”
Hoo boy. “What the fuck kind of question is that?” Anima responded to get the two kids off her ass.
Dante’s eyes teared up a little bit and stepped back. “I was just asking a question,” he said in a quiet voice.
Siënna looked over at Dante and decided she wasn’t having any of it. “Greg!” she called out, “Anima and Piro are watching dirty videos on the internet!” There was a reason why she was considered the house snitch.
Anima looked all around the room, her eyes wide and her heart beating in panic. There was only thing she had to do- run. She pushed Piro onto the floor and hauled ass out of the house and into the playground, where she hid behind a bush and waited for the calm after the storm. She hid for several minutes until she figured she was safe and slowly crawled out of the bush, where she unfortunately met Greg, Siënna, Dante, Piro, Katja, Cereza, and Axel all staring at her. Damn it, she was so close!
“Anima,” Greg started, “You know the only things allowed to be viewed on the internet here are age-appropriate material. You also know you’re not supposed to push people. You are not allowed to use the computer for the rest of the day. Now come on, let’s go back in the house.”
As Greg took his hand out to pick the girl up, Anima slapped it away and shouted, “Fuck you, this is America! I pay to be here, and that means I have the freedom to do whatever the hell I want!”
“You’re fourteen years old. You don’t pay taxes,” Siënna told her, “And besides, just because it’s a free country doesn’t mean that there are no rules. America isn’t even that free to begin with.”
And as if that wasn’t enough of a mindfuck, Dante said this-
The records scratched in Anima’s head. “Say what now?”
“In Sweden, two guys can get married, and it’s legal,” Dante repeated.
Anima sat up, her whole world spinning with confusion and shock. “Hold on, you can do that in Sweden?”
Dante shrugged with a blank expression on his face. “Yeah, that’s what my mom told me.”
“Wait a minute… I thought you could do that in America, too,” Anima said, looking up at Greg.
“Only in some states,” Greg answered somberly, “But not here… at least, not yet.”
The whole world turned blurry as Anima’s head starting pounding like a jackhammer at a construction site. Has it always been like this? If two guys could get legally married in Sweden, would that mean the same could happen to two girls? She looked up at Axel and asked him, “Is all of this true?”
“How the hell should I know? I’ve been living in America since I was five years old,” Axel answered with a slight shrug of the shoulders.
Well, that was useful information. “Thanks for nothing, asshole!” Anima said to him. It looked like she was going to have to figure this out on her own.
…
It was right after Group Time, and Anima was packing her brown suitcase for Sweden. She was going to leave right then and there- not by getting kicked out, but running away. She didn’t need Portland, Oregon anymore, and she especially didn’t need that asshole Christian Seger, Greg, Katja, anyone else in the group home, any other teacher or student at Nach Cuma Middle School, any other teacher at that other school, Catherine, and… her parents. The only person she needed was Penelope. Penelope, and that was all. So long YouChannell Group Home, goodbye Portland, Oregon, goodbye United States, hello Sweden!
“What’s with the suitcase?” Kishi asked as soon as she saw Anima walk out of her room into the hallway. She glanced at the suitcase once more and gasped. “You’re not really getting kicked out, are you?”
“No,” Anima flatly answered.
“Then why are you carrying your suitcase?” Kishi asked again.
Anima sighed. Kishi had always been the hardest person to explain these types of things to. “I’m moving to Sweden. I just can’t handle being tied down here anymore. I’m sorry.” She turned around and was about to sneak out the door when Kishi grabbed her by the wrist.
“Anima, that is the stupidest thing I have ever heard!” Kishi exclaimed, “Do you know how long it will take to get to Sweden?! Not to mention that it’s very cold there, and you don’t even know the language they speak!”
“So? I’ll adjust quickly,” Anima argued. She yanked her wrist out of Kishi’s hand and added, “Besides, I’ll email you or write to you. I’m not going to dump you as soon as I reach Sweden. You’ll see.”
“No, I don’t! It’s one thing if you’re getting kicked out, but it’s another thing if you’re just running away! What are you even running away from in the first place?!”
Anima froze in self-conscious fear. She didn’t want to tell Kishi the real reason- the main reason- why she wanted to go to Sweden in the first place. She wouldn’t understand. “I’m sorry, Kishi, but it’s just something I have to do. You’re not gonna understand.” She stared deeply into Kishi’s green eyes and added, “I’ll miss you though.”
Kishi opened and closed her mouth as if she was a fish gulping for air. She didn’t know what to say; she didn’t even know how to react.
“I have to go now,” Anima finally said, “I’ll talk to you soon, okay?” With that out of the way, she walked out of the front door and walked towards the woods, where she was certain that Penelope would be there singing a lovely song. Sure enough…
Anima knew what she had to do. She looked around the ground for a stick to step on and found a big branch that had fallen from a tree some time ago. Problem was, it was too thick and too heavy to be broken with one foot or even both feet. It didn’t even show the tiniest tear when Anima used all of her strength. In fact, it didn’t break at all when she picked it up in the air and tried to tear it in half with her bare hands. That was too tiring for her, so she set it back down and figured she needed to break the individual sticks growing out of the huge branch. But that didn’t work out at all because as soon as she picked up her foot, she tripped over the branch and landed flat on her face- hard.
“Ow!” Anima shouted at the top of her lungs, “Son of a fucking bitch!”
Leaves and sticks crunched under somebody’s running feet; the next thing Anima knew, Penelope was holding her hand out to help the poor girl up back onto her feet.
“Oh my God, Anima! Are you all right?” Penelope asked in a worried voice.
Anima brushed herself off and huffed, “Yeah, I’m all right.” She picked up her suitcase and brushed the dirt off of it.
Penelope stared at the suitcase and asked what Anima was doing with it.
“I’m running away to Sweden,” Anima answered with a slight smile on her face.
“Sweden?!” Penelope exclaimed with a confused look on her face, “Isn’t that, like, super far away?! You know, a place where you probably don’t even speak the language or even know anybody there?!”
“Relax, I’m not going alone,” Anima reassured her, “I was wondering if maybe you would like to come with me.”
Penelope’s jaw dropped slightly, and her big brown eyes widened in shock and despair. “Anima, I have family here!” she cried out, “I can’t just go to some foreign country where I don’t know anybody and don’t even know the language! Don’t you know how far away it is?! And how expensive it is to fly to a different country?! You’re acting really impractical right now!”
“Well, I don’t care anymore!” Anima yelled with tears stinging her eyes, “I don’t fit in anywhere! I don’t belong! I need you to come with me! You’re the only one I can even trust anymore!” She dropped head onto Penelope’s chest and sobbed hysterically.
All Penelope could do at that moment was stare. She wasn’t used to seeing Anima cry at all, especially not like this. What did she mean by not belonging anywhere, and did Sweden have to do with it? And why was she the only person Anima trusted? Did she have a worse family situation than hers? Was her family filled with homophobes, too?
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” Penelope apologized in a soothing whisper, holding Anima close to her chest as they slowly lowered themselves down on the ground where they soon lied next to each other.
“Hey, I’ve just realized something,” Penelope said after several minutes of complete silence, “We’re, like, the only two people who ever go into these woods.”
Anima looked over at her and asked, “Yeah? What about it?”
“You think we could make this our own woods? You know, just for me and you?”
“…You’d really do that?” Anima asked.
Penelope nodded. “I mean, Sweden already has gay marriage, and Portland kind of has the same weather as Sweden sometimes. So might as well make this kind of our own Sweden.”
Anima couldn’t believe her ears. Their own Sweden… just the two of them, all alone in these woods without anyone else intruding their land. “Without anyone else?”
Penelope nodded. “Especially without assholes like Christian Seger.”
The girls giggled as they rolled around on their backs and stared at the sky. The two of them all alone together without anyone else in their own Sweden… kind of like a Big Gay Forest.
“Why the fuck do we have to do this again?! I already have friends!” Anima whined to Greg as she and Piro were dragged towards the Kurois’ house.
“This was more Dr. Wong’s idea,” Greg said, “Besides, I think it would be great for you to improve your social skills and to have a diverse amount of friends.”
“But I already do have a diverse amount of friends!” Anima argued, “I have Kishi, and Lidiya, and-“
But it was too late to convince Greg because he had rung the doorbell and patiently waited.
“Hi, it’s so nice to see you again!” Mrs. Kuroi greeted much too eagerly (at least, Anima thought it was much too eagerly).
“Mayu!” Greg said happily, “I’m so happy to see you today! You remember Anima, don’t you?”
“That’s Anima?” Mrs. Kuroi asked. She stared at the young girl before she exclaimed, “My, she’s changed so much! So much taller, and I thought I remembered her having black hair.”
“They grow up so fast, don’t they?” Greg said.
Mrs. Kuroi nodded and turned her head towards the insides of her house. “Shibi,” she called out, “Look who’s here!”
Anima heard someone walking downstairs, and next thing she knew, she was staring at Shibi face to face.
“Mama, I don’t know this girl,” Shibi said, looking up at her mother.
“Oh, Shibi. Of course you do,” Mrs. Kuroi said, “That’s Anima. You remember Anima, don’t you?”
Shibi shook her head and stared at her mother in complete and utter confusion.
“Remember, you had that playdate with her back in June?” Mrs. Kuroi told her.
Still nothing.
“You had that kickball game with her a few months ago,” Greg added.
“Ohhh…” Took her that long to figure it out. One part of Anima was pissed that Shibi couldn’t obviously tell who she was, but another part of her was actually relieved. Could it have been the hair and the glasses that may have fooled her? After all, she wasn’t particularly fond of Shibi Kuroi or any playdate with her.
“Hi, Shibi!” Piro shouted at the top of his lungs, waving his arms around and around like a helicopter.
Shibi waved back a quick hello and hid behind her mother’s skirt.
“Come in, come in!” Mrs. Kuroi said, “I’ve got everything set out for our playdate today!”
Inside the Kurois’ house was a pink wooden coffee table with small pink plastic chairs opposite each table side inside a living room with rose-beige walls, dark pink curtains hanging from every window, and a brownish-pink wooden floor. On that pink wooden coffee table were two plastic tea cups- one light pink and the other sky blue, and next to the table was a whitish-pink couch that had not been sat on for either too long or not too often with a (thankfully) thirty-six-inch television right in front of them. Right beside the whitish-pink couch was a round, brownish-pink coffee table with a golden picture frame that had a picture of some girl with red hair- not ginger hair, just straight up red.
“Who’s this?” Anima asked Mrs. Kuroi when she returned to the living room with a tray full of finger paints, white sheets of paper, and paper towels.
“That’s because she’s in Oregon Tech, majoring in computer science right now.” Mrs. Kuroi put down the tray of paints and accessories onto the wooden coffee table and added, “We’re very proud of her. Aren’t we, Shibi?”
Shibi nodded as she pulled a piece of paper out of the stack. “I remember Kelly,” she stated flatly.
“Of course you do,” Mrs. Kuroi said, “She’s your big sister.”
Shibi nodded and dipped her fingers into red paint while Piro dipped his entire hand into yellow paint. Anima winced; the paint oozing off of their fingers brought back memories she never wanted to remember ever again.
“Would you like a paint brush, Anima?” Mrs. Kuroi asked, finally snapping the girl out of her distress.
Anima nodded, grateful for the other option so that she didn’t have to live through… that ever again.
“Bitty!” Mrs. Kuroi called up the stairs, “Can you find some paint brushes for me, please?”
“Yes, Mommy!” Bitty shouted from upstairs in her room. Anima heard some fumbling around up there for several minutes before she trampled downstairs and shouted-
“Thank you, Bitty,” Mrs. Kuroi said. She set the paintbrush down onto the coffee table in hopes that Anima would at least join the fun.
“Can I join?” Bitty asked, her eyes wide with pleading and excitement.
“Of course!” Mrs. Kuroi answered, laying out another piece of paper onto the coffee table.
“Yay!” Bitty happily skipped over to her place near the coffee table and slammed her hand into red finger paint, letting the oozing liquid drip off of her dirty, germ-filled fingers onto that fresh, white piece of paper. Anima winced once more, being reminded of all the pain she had to face in the past.
“Anima,” Greg whispered to the sulking girl, who was sliding down into a fern green chair, “Aren’t you going to join them in painting?”
Anima’s eyes shifted to the floor, not sure on what to even say. She hated seeing the paint ooze down Shibi’s, Bitty’s, and Piro’s fingers, but she also hated having someone on her ass for not wanting to join in on that mess. “…I’m just not interested,” she finally answered in a mumble.
Greg only nodded and didn’t say anything else.
“Who wants some sandwiches?” Mrs. Kuroi asked a couple of hours later, holding a sky blue plastic tray filled with tuna fish sandwiches.
“Ooh, ooh! Me me me!” Bitty shouted, scrambling up to her feet and zooming over to quickly grab a sandwich.
“Anima, do you want a sandwich?” Mrs. Kuroi asked, looking straight at the visiting girl.
Ugh, tuna fish! Anima already had to eat enough of that shit at home; she would think that since she was a guest at someone else’s house that she would get to eat something a little more special. But no, tuna fish sandwiches it was, and Anima had to reluctantly accept the sandwich that was probably gonna taste bland as hell.
“Mayu, I need to ask you something,” Greg said as he and Mrs. Kuroi walked into the kitchen, “Do you think that Anima might on the autism spectrum?”
“What do you mean by that?” Mrs. Kuroi asked, pouring milk into four plastic cups.
“Well, she doesn’t seem to be all that social,” Greg explained, “And when she saw the finger paint when we first came inside, she winced at the thought of having it on her fingers. Do you think that being sensitive to some sensory items and the lack of social skills might mean that Anima has autism?”
“That’s a pretty good question,” Mrs. Kuroi said, “Those are symptoms of autism, but I don’t really think that Anima that.”
Greg looked over at Mrs. Kuroi in confusion, wondering why she would think that when it looked kind of obvious to him.
“You see, people born with autism aren’t able to speak in their early childhoods. That’s a major part of autism. If somebody is able to talk yet lacks any social skills or has any sensory issues, then that might be Asperger’s Syndrome. But I haven’t noticed any of those symptoms in Anima so far, so I don’t think she has autism.”
Greg only nodded, not uttering a single sound as he wondered just how exactly Anima may or may not be on the autism spectrum.
“I miss Kelly,” Shibi said right out of nowhere right after Greg and Mrs. Kuroi came back into the living room.
“I’m sure you do, sweetie,” Mrs. Kuroi replied, “I miss her, too.”
“Didn’t you say that Kelly was in Oregon Tech?” Greg asked Mrs. Kuroi.
“Why yes, she is,” Mrs. Kuroi answered as proudly as a mother would be of her oldest daughter going to school in a polytechnic university. She and Greg talked on and on about Kelly and college and education for the longest time while Anima lied around on her chair, staring at Piro and Shibi eating their food and Bitty staring out the window. God, nothing of interest was even going on; what was even the fucking point?!
And as if that wasn’t enough, Shibi disappeared for a little bit only to drag her pink Barbie radio back downstairs and turned on some really shitty music.
Anima didn’t like this song- “Not Gonna Get Us” by t.A.T.u; she especially didn’t like being reminded of what happened to her and Catherine… some time ago.
Anima slid further down into her chair and closed her eyes, hoping that something else, ANYTHING else, would distract her. And then, right before she was able to snap-
“Look!” Bitty, who had been staring out the window, shouted, “There’s a moving van across that house!”
Finally, some distraction; the music was even turned off! Everyone, even the adults, ran to the window and stared at a U-Haul truck was parked right in front of the house right across the street and two beefy white men carrying a white mattress with an orange-and-black cheetah-designed blanket.
“Must be another girl,” Mrs. Kuroi said.
Greg nodded, then looked over at Anima and told her, “This could be a good chance to make another friend.”
Anima huffed through her nostrils; why the fuck would she want to go through the pain of exercising her social skills AGAIN in such a short amount of time?! Again, she already had friends- Kishi, Amanda, Lidiya, and even Penelope- okay, maybe they’re not at that point yet, but still!
“Now, where were we?” Mrs. Kuroi said. She cleared her throat and asked if anyone wanted to play a game.
“Ooh, ooh! We can play musical chairs!” Bitty chirped excitedly. She was about to run back upstairs when her mother grabbed her arms and told her that they already had a radio right here in the living room.
“But Mommy!” Bitty whined, “I wanna pick a song this time! Shibi picked the last song! Why can’t I?”
Mrs. Kuroi sighed. “Alright,” she relented, “But come back quickly.”
Bitty did- with a black smartphone set to the Owl City featuring Carly Rae Jepsen song “Good Time”. “I didn’t have a CD of the song I wanted like Shibi did,” she stated.
Mrs. Kuroi stared at the black smartphone that Bitty was holding; something about it looked familiar, almost as if it shouldn’t have been in the house.
“Girls, stop!” Mrs. Kuroi, who was starting to become exasperated, commanded, “Hand me the phone, Bitty.”
Sulking and pouting, Bitty handed over the phone to her mother.
“This does kind of look like Kelly’s-” Mrs. Kuroi said to herself until the words halted immediately in her head, which made her realize something.
Mrs. Kuroi started pacing back forth across the living room muttering something in Japanese.
“Mayu, what’s wrong?” Greg asked.
Mrs. Kuroi looked straight up into Greg’s dark brown eyes and shrieked, “Kelly forgot her phone, and she’s all the way in Wilsonville!” She paced back and forth again, her hands beginning to reach for her hair. It looked like she was too busy freaking the hell out, which was good for Anima because it gave her a valid excuse to finally leave.
“Well, that was eventful,” Anima sarcastically told Greg as she, him, and Piro walked home.
Greg sighed and lowered his head; it was true, but she didn’t have to say it.
“Poor bastard didn’t even have a chance to shine,” Anima continued, looking right over at Piro.
“Anima, don’t call Piro a bastard,” Greg said, his eyebrows tiredly burrowed into his forehead.
“Oh no, it’s Hal. Don’t trust anyone named Hal,” Piro groaned, doing a perfect infliction of James Rolfe of the Angry Video Game Nerd.
Greg looked over at Anima and asked, “Have you been showing Piro those Angry Video Game Nerd videos again?”
“No,” Anima lied out of her rhinoceros shit-filled asshole.
“Actually, Hal was the company that made Kirby and developed on Smash Brothers. So… maybe this won’t be as bad as I thought,” Piro continued, still with his perfect infliction of James Rolfe’s voice.
The trio stayed silent until Greg opened the door, which squeaked so loudly that Shibi opened the window and started straight at them.
“Oh no, I jinxed it,” Piro groaned, concluding his perfect infliction of James Rolfe as the Angry Video Game Nerd.
This whole day was gonna be jinxed regardless of whatever was gonna happen.
Every Thanksgiving, there would always be a fight when getting dressed- it was usually Niklas and Ryan fighting, though there have been some other fights in the past years. On this day, it was just Niklas and Ryan fighting in the bathroom.
“You two, break it up!” Greg told the boys, separating the boys with his hands.
“But it’s a Thanksgiving tradition!” Ryan exclaimed in a rather whiny voice.
“It’s a Thanksgiving tradition to YOU, dipshit!” Niklas argued, kicking Ryan in the shin.
“It takes two to tango, dumb ass!” Ryan argued back, kicking Niklas right back in the shin.
“Well, this tradition is going to end this year!” Greg announced, “From now on, you two are going to get dressed in your own rooms instead of fighting in the bathroom every Thanksgiving morning. Do I make myself clear?”
Ryan and Niklas rolled their eyes and nodded. They reluctantly dragged their feet to their rooms and got dressed for the day, which made Greg beam with satisfaction.
Meanwhile, Anima, Piro, Kishi, Shibi, and Bitty were out front just hanging out, staring at houses in their neighborhood.
“Look!” Bitty exclaimed, pointing to the house across the YouChannell Home, “There’s gonna be some new people moving soon!”
Sure enough, there was a “Sold” sign posted in front of the house in front of the YouChannell Home.
Anima sensed a strange feeling of familiarity with that house. Where did that house come from, and why does she know about it? Oh yeah… it was because she had been thinking about Penelope only a while back.
“I didn’t even notice that this house was for sale,” Kishi said. She turned to Bitty and asked, “So, when are the new neighbors moving in?”
Bitty shrugged. “I don’t know,” she answered.
The gang was quiet for a moment until Shibi answered, “My mom and dad said the new neighbors are moving in in March.”
March?! “What the fu-”
“That’s almost four months from now!” Kishi interrupted Anima. She looked back at the house and said, “I wonder who’s moving in.”
Anima wondered that, too. She hoped it was Penelope moving in, even though she knew it was a fat chance that they would ever get to meet each other again. But still, a girl could dream.
“Anima! Kishi! Piro! It’s time for breakfast!” Katja called out from the front door.
“Hold on, I gotta do a Thanksgiving tradition!” Anima called back.
“Wait, what Thanksgiving tradition?” Kishi asked.
Anima smirked and took a piece-of-shit green MP3 player out of her jean pocket. She turned it on, expecting to epically pose to Creed’s “Higher”. Instead, the green piece of shit barely made a put of a noise before dying. What the fuck?
“Just get in the house,” Katja said flatly.
…
It was Thanksgiving dinner, and everyone was going to have turkey, green bean and cheddar casserole, buttermilk biscuits, and cranberry cobbler. But before anyone could dig in, Greg decided that it was a good idea for the whole house to give thanks.
Greg gave thanks for being there for so many people and for the friendships he had managed to have.
Katja gave thanks for the opportunity to make a difference in many people’s lives.
Marcus gave thanks for a chance at life to follow his dreams and meet many amazing people.
Kishi gave thanks for a wonderful life and many amazing friends.
Piro gave thanks for My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.
Then it was Anima’s turn.
“What the fuck am I supposed to say?” Anima asked, looking up from her feet.
“Just say what you’re thankful for,” Greg answered.
“Thankful for what?!” Anima couldn’t think of shit, and she wasn’t ready to admit it.
“That’s okay, Anima. You can take your time,” Greg said.
Anima tensed up and looked around the table, trying to think of what random thing she could claim she was thankful for.
“Listen, it’s not that complex,” Faustine said, “Just say something and get this whole thing over with.”
“Well, shut up and let me think!” Anima shouted, clenching her fists. She stared back at her feet and tried to go back where she was thinking. Okay, she’s got it. She looked up at the crowd and took a deep breath. Wait, what was she going to say again? “Hold on, I forgot what I was going to say.”
Fern huffed and exclaimed, “Little girl, will you hurry it the fuck up and just say something?!”
“What?! What the fuck do you want me to say?!” Anima shouted back.
“Just something! Now hurry it the fuck up!” Ryan answered back in a louder yell.
Anima was about to throw her plate across the table when Ami shouted, “It’s okay, Anima! Take your time! Thanksgiving isn’t that important anyways!”
“Shut up, Ami!” Anima shouted back at her.
Ami slid back into her seat and mumbled to herself, “Jesus, I was only trying to make you feel better.”
Okay, where was she again? Anima rubbed her temples together to get some thought into her head. Let’s see… one, two, three-
“Hey, asshole!” Niklas shouted at Anima, “Some of us actually want to eat!”
Axel conked out at the table. This made Anima so pissed off that she threw her plate on the ground and ran towards her room where she stayed for pretty much the rest of the day.
…
“I see a phoenix flying up in the sky,” Kishi said as she and Anima were lying down on the living room floor staring at the ceiling, “What do you see?”
“A bunch of squiggles,” Anima flatly answered. That was mostly true, but she didn’t really want to admit what else she was seeing.
Kishi huffed. “Anima, you always do this!” she whined. She turned onto her back and added, “Can’t you even pretend to see anything up there?!”
Anima squinted towards the ceiling so hard she could actually see something… she saw herself and Penelope in white wedding dresses holding each other’s hands tightly together.
It was beautiful! Anima had never felt so happy to be with someone her entire life! All she wanted to do right then and there was to stay with Penelope forever and ever and ever and always. Anima looked up at Penelope’s sweet chocolate eyes, but something was off about her. Penelope’s eyes and hair were still brown, but the coloring was off; the hair was a lighter shade while the eyes were a darker shade. And as if that weren’t enough, background turned red and Penelope, who was no longer Penelope, pinned Anima down to the ground.
It was-
“Catherine?!” Anima exclaimed, “What the hell are you doing here?!”
“Listen here, you little shit!” Catherine shouted at Anima, holding her arms to the ground, “I’m gonna fuck you up just like how you fucked me up!”
“What are you talking about?!” Anima inquired angrily, “I didn’t do anything to you!”
But Catherine wasn’t having any of it because she kept Anima’s arms pinned to the ground as she hiked her knee up and kneed her in the-
And then Anima woke up, her chest tight and her heart racing. She turned around to talk to Kishi, but Kishi had already gone to bed. So she looked up at the ceiling to find another picture to see. Alas, she didn’t see anything.
Niklas was at home in the living room visiting and watching old Hanna-Barbera cartoons with Greg, Ryan, Tamie, and Marianne on the stuffy orange couch. At the moment, they were watching The Jetsons, but that wasn’t the most important in the YouChannell Home because Minha screamed bloody murder from her room-
Marianne looked at Niklas and whispered, “What the fuck is she going on about?”
“Get used to this ’cause it happens every day,” Niklas whispered back.
Greg walked up to Minha’s room and told her to take some deep breaths. “What is it about your money being stolen?”
“Somebody’s stolen all my babysitting money, and I don’t know who!” Minha sobbed.
“All fifty dollars of it?” Greg asked.
“Yes!”
Minha was a babysitter for the Manalo girls Kaila and Allison from right across the street, and she guarded every note of her money in her Secret Box. Everyone in the YouChannell Home had a Secret Box- it was practically the only thing that any occupant could have to themselves that didn’t have to be shared, and to have something out of one’s Secret Box shared is about as much as a sin as… well, stealing.
“What’s going on?” Anima asked as she was walking towards her room.
Greg was about to tell Anima to mind her business, but Minha buried her head into Greg’s chest and cried out, “I want my money back!”
Anima stared at the crying girl and her empty Secret Box. Then she got a brilliant idea. She was no longer Anima Hatsune, she was Anima ManWhore: Law at Attorney! Because she had spent her internet time that day watching Harvey Birdman: Attorney at Law, she shouted at the top of her lungs-
Minha looked up at Anima and asked like a bitch, “What are you talking about?”
“I’ll help you find the thief that stole your money,” Anima said much nicely.
Minha stared at Anima like a big ass zit was replacing her entire face. Then she slowly got up, walked towards Anima, and hugged. Not just a little hug, but a big old bear hug. “Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!” she squealed into Anima’s ears.
Anima didn’t know what to say.
…
A few minutes later, Anima was watching Piro watching an AVGN review of Day Dreamin’ Davey.
“Move, Peanut,” Anima said, “I gotta do my research!”
But Piro was too engrossed in this video to even hear whatever the fuck Anima had just said.
“Alright, fine! I’ll just get another assistant with my legal case!” Anima shouted at him. She turned around and stormed towards Katja’s room. Then she noticed the door was locked. “Hello?” she said, knocking on the door, “I need to talk about something!”
Katja opened the door of her room, which turned out to have Cereza in it. “Anima, I’m busy with Cereza right now. When I’m finished, I’ll come talk to you,” she said.
Anima walked further into the room. “No, I need to talk to you about something NOW!”
“If you need to talk about something this urgently, you can go talk to Greg,” Katja calmly replied.
“Yeah, go away, Anima!” Cereza said more bluntly.
Just then, Anima saw the pile of Manilla-colored folders on Katja’s desk. Without even thinking, she grabbed one from near the bottom and ran off.
“Anima, give that back!” Katja exclaimed.
But it was too late. Anima ran quickly downstairs into the dark and dusty furnace, still holding that folder close to her chest. When she figured she was safe, she sat down and tried to read it when she heard something from an old TV. It turned out to be a bootleg DVD of an episode of My Super Sweet 16, and Ryu-jin and Axel were watching it. Anima sighed; she should’ve figured someone else was in the furnace.
“What the fuck are you two doing down here?!” Anima asked the boys.
“What the fuck are you doing down here?” Ryu-jin asked back.
“I’m trying to hide from Katja,” Anima answered.
“Well, so am I. And Minha too,” Ryu-jin said.
“Why the fuck are you hiding from Katja and Minha?”
“N-N-No reason!” Ryu-jin blushed and turned back to the TV.
Anima turned to Axel and asked him why the fuck he was in the furnace.
“I got caught eavesdropping on Katja and Cereza,” Axel answered.
“Oh yeah, those two,” Anima said, “They were taking forever with whatever the fuck they were going on about.”
“Yeah, I heard Cereza’s getting adopted from some couple in Salem.”
Well, damn. “Well, damn! When’s she leaving?”
“I don’t know. I got caught before they said anything about it.” Then he turned his head and stared at Anima holding the random folder and added in a surprised whisper, “Holy shit! You got her file?!”
“No, I don’t! This is someone else’s folder, and it’s for a case I’m doing! So leave me alone!” With that out of the way, Anima opened the folder and took out what wasn’t Cereza’s file, but instead… Riley’s file! Oh, this was interesting! Okay, not the first part since it referenced the usual stuff (name, date of birth, gender, height, weight, where the person was from), but what was most intriguing was this last part.
Riley has kleptomania and obsessive compulsive disorder.
Anima kind of had an idea of what Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (or OCD) was, but she had no clue on what kleptomania was. She sneaked out of the furnace on all fours in case Katja and Cereza were still on her ass into the kitchen where Minha was using the computer watching some make-up tutorial. “Move, I need to use the computer.”
“It’s my turn. You don’t get a turn until 1:00,” Minha told the girl like a bitch.
“Well, damn! Do you want me to help your case or not?!”
Minha huffed through her nose and let Anima use the computer. There, Anima searched up “kleptomania” and clicked on a Wikipedia article, which said:
Kleptomania is the inability to refrain from the urge for stealing items and is usually done for reasons other than personal use or financial gain. First described in 1816, kleptomania is classified in psychiatry as an impulse control disorder.[2] Some of the main characteristics of the disorder suggest that kleptomania could be an obsessive-compulsive spectrum disorder, but also share similarities with addictive and mood disorders.[3][4]
Oh boy was there any evidence! “Minha, I think I know who stole your money!”
…
Niklas, Marianne, Ryan, Tamie, Greg, and Riley were watching Inch High Private Eye when Anima bursted into the living room and shouted, “Riley Denise Wilson, you’re under arrest for stealing Minha Nohara’s money!”
Everyone in the living room looked at Anima like she was high on heroin.
“How the fuck did you find out about my middle name, and what the fuck are you going on about?!” Riley inquired.
“Don’t play dumb, you kleptomaniac son of a bitch!” Anima exclaimed, “You know what you did, and I’m gonna take your ass to court for it!”
Riley looked around awkwardly and mumbled, “I’d like to see you try, motherfucker.”
Greg also looked at Riley and Anima. “Anima, what are you saying about Riley?”
“No I didn’t!” Riley insisted, “I ain’t even been to her room! Hell, I barely even know the bitch!”
“Yeah, she’s been with us this whole time!” Niklas added.
“Really?” Anima stared at Niklas like he was high on crack. “Was she there when you guys were watching The Jetsons earlier?”
No, not really. Now that they thought about it, where the hell was Riley during that time?
Anima leaned towards only a couple of centimeters away from Riley’s face and whispered meanly, “See your ass in court.”
…
“And now the honorary judge, Judge Ami Wilkinson, to judge on the case of Minha Nohara v. Riley Wilson,” Kishi lamely announced in complete boredom, “The prosecution, consisting of Anima Hatsune and Piro Yan, and the defense, consisting of Faustine Louis and Tessa Wilkinson.”
Kishi stepped out of the way as the honorable Judge Ami Wilkinson walked straight towards a brown box set in the backyard and sat down on a small white chair. “All rise.”
All rose.
“And how does the defendant plea?”
“Not guilty, your honor,” Faustine answered with great dignity.
Judge Ami nodded. “All sit.”
All sat.
“Your honor, I would like to call the defendant to the stand,” Anima ManWhore announced.
The defendant took her place at the stand next to the judge’s box desk.
“Miss Wilson, where were you when Minha screamed about her money being stolen?” Anima ManWhore asked.
“I was in my room, texting my friend Marilyn,” Riley flatly answered.
“Really now?” Anima found that hard to believe. “And where the hell were you before Minha screamed?”
“In my room, texting Marilyn. Why the fuck do you find this shit hard to believe?!”
“Objection, your honor! She’s being defiant!” Anima tattled to the judge, “You should charge her with contempt of court!”
“Bitch, this ain’t no fucking court! Damn, shit!” Riley shouted, her face redder than her hair.
“Order in the court!” Ami shouted at the pair, “You two need to shut the fuck up!”
Anima and Riley glared at Ami like she was a bitch, which she was.
“Your honor, I would like to call the victim Minha Nohara to the stand,” Faustine said.
The victim, Minha Nohara, took her place at the stand.
“Miss Nohara, when did you first discovered that your babysitting money had been stolen?” Faustine asked.
“Well, it was when I had just finished using the toilet. That what when I noticed my Secret Box was on the ground. When I picked it up, I saw… I saw…” Minha choked up. “I saw that the fifty dollars I have made while babysitting the Manalos was gone.”
Anima walked towards the stand and patted Minha’s back, hugging her to show some comfort.
“Miss Nohara,” Faustine began after the crying and comforting, “If I may ask, what were you doing before you went to use the toilet?”
“I was playing Uno in the kitchen.”
“And who were you playing Uno with?”
“Marcus, Tessa, Fern, and Kishi.”
Faustine took notes in a small purple notebook.
“So, you can confirm that my client wasn’t with you guys?”
Minha shook her head.
“So, my assumption is correct!” Anima exclaimed, “The defendant is guilty!”
“Objection, your honor!” Tessa said, “There’s not enough proof to hand down a ‘guilty’ plea yet!”
“Objection, your honor!” Anima shouted, “Yes, the hell it is! Riley Denise Wilson is guilty as all get-out, and she should be punished for stealing my client’s money!”
“With what proof?!” Tessa inquired.
“Did you not hear the testimony that my client had just given out?” Anima screamed, her face redder than her sweater, “If that’s not enough proof, then I don’t know what the fuck you’re going on abou-”
“Order in the court! Order in the court!” Ami shouted, “If you two are gonna argue, take it inside!”
Faustine planted her hand onto her forehead. “You guys, let’s just call for a recess, okay?” she groaned.
…
“Oh, my God damn God!” Riley groaned in the living room, where Niklas, Ryan, Tamie, Greg, Ryu-jin, and Marianne were watching Top Cat.
Niklas looked up at the accused girl flopped on top of the orange couch. “What’s wrong?” he asked.
“Man, fuck these kids,” Riley answered, “They all ganging up on me trying to accuse me of stealing somebody’s money or some shit like that.”
Ryu-jin, who was reading a Seventeen magazine on the living room floor, looked up at Riley and said nonchalantly, “Oh yeah. I heard Minha screaming on about it all morning.”
Riley looked at Ryu-jin and asked, “Why the fuck are you reading a Seventeen magazine?”
“N-N-No reason!” Ryu-jin blushed and turned back to his magazine.
“Anyways, why would a seventeen-year-old steal some random stranger’s money just to buy a Seventeen magazine?” Marianne asked, “Like, aren’t those for twelve-year-old girls?”
“Who the fuck knows?” Riley sighed, “This shit’s just giving me a headache.”
…
“Your Honor, I would like to call Marcus Yusuf to the stand,” Anima announced.
Marcus took his place at the stand.
“Mr. Yusuf, if my client is telling the truth, then you must’ve been playing Uno with her, Tessa, Fern, and Kishi, correct?”
“…Yeah?”
“And the defendant wasn’t there with you guys?”
“…No?”
“So that must mean that she was in my client’s room stealing her money, correct?”
“…No?”
“Well how the fuck do you know she wasn’t stealing my client’s money if the defendant wasn’t playing Uno with you guys?! Unless…”
No, she wouldn’t.
“Unless of course…”
She really wouldn’t.
“You have a crush on Riley Wilson and you’re accompanying her in her crimes!”
Everyone in the court except for the judge and Marcus started laughing their asses off.
But no one was listening to him because everyone was still laughing their asses off. It got to the point where Ami pounded her fist onto the box and shrieked at the top of her lungs, “ORDER IN THE COURT! ORDER IN THE COURT! EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP! THIS IS A SERIOUS COURT CASE, YOU KNOW!”
Finally, every shut their damn traps. In fact, the whole courtroom was silent for a few minutes until Faustine replied with, “Proceed.”
…
“Jesus, it really shouldn’t be this hard to prove someone’s innocence,” Faustine confided to Tessa in the kitchen.
“Thing is, how are we gonna prove anything if there’s really no proof?” Tessa asked.
Faustine sighed long and hard. “Who the hell knows?”
Meanwhile, Riley was in her room texting Marilyn.
A minute later, Marilyn texted back, “Girl, what you talkin’ about?”
“All these kids trying acting like I stole some girl’s money and trying to prove that like it’s a fucking court case or some shit.”
“…Like Judge Judy?”
Fucking hell, Marilyn. “Girl, get your ass over here.”
Riley put her phone up and walked into the living room where the same gang was watching Peter Potamus, but she didn’t stay for long because Anima was also in there.
“Inch High Private Eye,” Anima said, “That’s a dick euphemism, isn’t it?”
Ryan was the first one to crack up laughing, then Tamie, then Marianne, and finally Niklas. Hell, even Greg couldn’t help but crack a smile. Riley had enough of that shit, so she stalked to the kitchen where Faustine and Tessa were.
Tessa sighed. “If only there was something, someone to prove that Riley’s innocent-” And then she saw it, hidden under a ceramic bowl. “Hello, what is this?” She pulled the small piece of paper out from under the bowl and closely analyzed it. Sure enough, it turned out to be a receipt from some store.
“What’s it say?” Faustine asked.
“You know about that convenience store down the street?” Tessa asked, “Well, it’s a receipt from that place with, get this, fifty dollars spent on Seventeen magazines!”
That got Riley’s attention. “Hol’ on. What you say about fifty dollars and Seventeen magazines?!”
“I said that someone went to the convenience store and bought Seventeen magazines with fifty dollars,” Tessa answered.
Oh. Shit. “I think I know who you’re talking about,” Riley said.
…
“Your Honor, I would like to bring Ryu-jin Nohara to the stand,” Faustine said when court resumed.
Ryu-jin took his place at the stand.
“Mr. Nohara, where you when your sister inquired about the whereabouts of her babysitting money?” Faustine asked.
Ryu-jin blushed and squirmed in his seat. “I was… in the furnace… reading a magazine… all alone,” he slowly answered, his voice cracking with each pause.
“And what magazine were you reading at the time?”
This time, Ryu-jin froze in his seat. “S–Seventeen?”
“So this magazine, correct?” Tessa said, holding up the Seventeen magazine that Ryu-jin had been reading the whole time. The cover had a picture of Lucy Hale and everything.
This time, Ryu-jin slid down in his seat. “Yes,” he barely whispered.
“Objection!” Anima shouted, “How the fuck are you gonna prove that he’s guilty?! You can’t just throw around false accusations like that!”
“False accusations,” Riley grumbled under her breath.
“Actually, we do have evidence,” Tessa said. She waved the receipt high right in front of Anima’s face. “Do you know what this is?”
“If I could actually read it, I would know what the fuck you’re talking about!” Anima answered, “The damn thing’s too blurry for me! I can’t read that!”
“Miss Wilkinson, will you please put the evidence down and let the prosecutor read it?!” Faustine asked, her eyebrows furrowed in exasperation.
Tessa placed the evidence onto Anima’s desk. “Do you know what this is?” she asked again.
Anima carefully analyzed the evidence and answered, “It looks like a receipt.”
“Correct,” Tessa said, “Now what exactly was bought?”
“…Seventeen magazines?”
“And how much money was spent on said magazines?”
“…Fifty dollars?”
“So it’s safe to assume that Mr. Nohara stole fifty dollars from his own sister to buy some copies of Seventeen magazines?”
Anima squirmed in her seat and nervously played with her hair. It was at this moment she knew- she fucked up.
“HE DID WHAT?!” Minha shrieked at the top of her lungs. She ran straight to Ryu-jin and proceeded to beat the everloving shit out of him.
Finally, Katja and Greg managed to enter the backyard and tear the twins apart.
“What’s going on?” Katja inquired.
“Ryu-jin stole all of my babysitting money to buy magazines!” Minha cried out.
“Is this true?” Greg asked, looking right into Ryu-jin’s face.
Ryu-jin looked at the ground with great remorse and barely answered, “Yes.”
“And they was all accusing me of stealing her money,” Riley added, “Especially this one.” She pointed at Anima when she said that.
Katja looked at Anima and said, “Which reminds me- I found that file you stole from me while I was talking to Cereza in the furnace.”
Oh, shit.
“Is that what this whole court case thing was about?” Greg asked.
Anima blushed and darted her eyes back and forth from the ground to the sky. “I mean, to be fair, I thought I had enough evidence.”
“Speaking of evidence,” Faustine said, handing the actual evidence to Greg and Katja.
Greg and Katja stared at the receipt for a quick while. Then Greg looked up at Anima and asked if she anything to say about this. Before Anima could even open up that big ass mouth of hers, Minha looked up at Riley and said, “I’m sorry for falsely accusing you of stealing my money.”
Riley only nodded and rolled her eyes.
…
“So what the fuck happened with you?” Niklas asked Riley in the living room as they were all watching JabberJaw.
Riley shrugged and answered, “Some little kids tried to try me for stealing someone’s money.”
“And?”
“Turns out it was someone else.”
Niklas nodded. “Yeah, I pretty much knew it wasn’t you the whole time.”
Riley glared at Niklas like an owl and asked, “Then why the fuck didn’t you say anything?”
Niklas shrugged. “I just didn’t feel like getting involved in any drama.”
Ryan, Tamie, and Marianne started snickering, then started laughing like the end of a Harvey Birdman: Attorney at Law episode.
Riley scoffed and mumbled to herself, “No respect.”
JabberJaw would’ve agreed with Riley.
“Ayy, ya’ll need anything from me?” Marilyn asked, barging open the door.
“Folks, I have an announcement,” Anima told Kishi, Amanda, and Lidiya on the colorful plastic playground equipment after lunch.
Lidiya stared at the brown suitcase right besides Anima’s feet. “So, what’s with the suitcase?” she asked.
Anima glared at Lidiya and mumbled, “Yeah… about that.” She cleared her throat and continued, “I’m leaving today, and I’m never coming back. Don’t expect me to call you or text you or… actually, just don’t expect anything from me, okay? Thanks.”
Kishi and Amanda were in shock while Lidiya just rolled her eyes.
“Wait, so if you’re leaving, can I at least have your Lucky Star manga?” Amanda asked.
That bitch! Anima was shocked; Anima was angry. Amanda wouldn’t even miss her, and neither would Lidiya for that matter! Huh, some friends they were! “Well, bye I guess,” she said rather harshly. She picked up her suitcase and jumped off the playground equipment.
When Lidiya and Amanda had said their goodbyes, Kishi walked up to Anima and asked, “Are you really leaving today?”
Anima gulped before tearfully nodding. She could barely get the “Yeah.” out of her mouth. And that was when Kishi did the strangest thing.
“I’m gonna miss you, Anima,” Kishi whimpered, her arms squeezing Anima tightly.
Anima didn’t know what to say. Even though Kishi was her best friend, she still wasn’t expecting a reaction as strong as this. “I’m gonna miss you too,” she said quietly. Then she picked up her suitcase and walked back to the YouChannell Home for the final time.
“Look what I got!” Piro shouted at Anima when she walked into the living room. He shoved a whole sheet of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic stickers.
Anima looked at Niklas, who was sitting on the couch, and asked where the hell Piro got those stickers from.
“How should I know? I didn’t get any mail,” Niklas answered, looking a lot more irritated than usual.
Anima sucked her cheeks in and placed her hands on her hips. “Well, didn’t I get any mail?”
“Oh my God, who the hell cares?!” Niklas shouted as he threw his hands in the air.
“I do! This could very well be my last day here!”
“Good! Nobody here likes you anyways!” With that out of the way, Niklas jumped off the couch and stormed towards his room.
Nobody liked her; it was true. Otherwise, Anima wouldn’t be getting kicked out of the YouChannell Home on this day. She slumped towards the stuffy orange couch in the living room where she asked Piro if he liked her.
“I asked if you liked me or not!” Anima exclaimed.
Piro shrugged, which made Anima jumped on him and pull his hair. While she was pulling his hair, she tried to grab Piro’s stickers but wasn’t able because Greg picked her up and carried her to the Vent Room.
“Anima, I need to know why you thought beating up Piro was a good idea,” Greg said.
“Why the fuck do I have to tell you?! For all you know, this could very well be my last day here!” Anima shouted.
Greg stared at Anima for a minute. “Tell me what you’re referring to.”
That fucker! Anima knew he was just pretending to not know! Oh well, she was leaving today anyways, so-
Greg was taken aback. “Who… Who told you this?”
“Katja!” Anima sobbed with tears stinging her eyes.
If Greg wasn’t taken aback, he was sure silent. “Hold on a bit,” he said, quietly leaving Anima in the Vent Room.
All alone in the big white room, Anima knew that Greg was probably laughing about her, and who could blame him? She was a terrible person, a horrible person who had no redeemable traits, and there was no hope for her. Then Anima saw herself in the principal’s office at the special school- a tiny little girl who was bad in every way. She was getting kicked out of that school, no question about it.
Just then, someone knocked on the door. “Anima… is it okay if I come in?” Katja’s voice asked.
Hell, why not?! Might as well get one last yelling-at session out of the way before she left. Anima opened the door and let the old fuck in.
“Anima, about our meeting yesterday,” Katja began, “I was meaning that if you acted up like bullying again, you might be kicked out of public school. I didn’t mean to say that if you acted up like bullying again, you’ll be kicked out of this house. I’m sorry if I made you think this way.”
Anima blinked back tears and asked in a small voice, “You mean… I’m not getting kicked out?”
“No,” Katja said, “We can never kick you out.” She patted Anima’s back and added, “Now go on and unpack your suitcase, alright?”
As Anima walked into her room and unpacked her suitcase, she realized that maybe Greg and Katja loved her like she was part of their family… did they?
…
Anima and Kishi were lying down on the living room floor staring at the cream-colored textured ceiling right before bedtime.
“I see the most beautiful mountains and puffs of wind,” Kishi said. She turned to Anima and asked, “What do you see?”
Anima squinted and tried her best to see a picture, any picture, on the ceiling but it was so blurry she didn’t even try. “A bunch of lines.”
“Oh Anima!” Kishi exclaimed with a giggle. She rolled over onto her side and said, “I’m so glad you’re not leaving.”
“What the fuck are you doing here?!” Anima questioned at a black figure outlined in white scribbles. The black figure looked a lot like her mother standing there in a static background- all black, white, and gray.
“You don’t belong here,” the black figure said.
Anima turned around and saw a public school with ivory white brick walls and a scratchy maroon roof. She turned back to the figure and asked angrily, “What are you talking about?”
“Don’t act dumb!” the figure shouted, “You’re loud, you’re obnoxious, you’re rude, you’re ungrateful- that’s what makes you a horrible human being! You’re going to get kicked out of that school the second you step foot, and then what? What are you going to do, huh?! You can’t go back to that old school, and those idiots accept people left and right! So what the hell did you do so wrong that they kicked you out?!”
“At least I’m not a piece of shit like you!” Anima shouted back, tears stinging her eyes and fingers clenched into a fist.
That was when the black figure seized Anima’s shirt and screeched, “NOW LISTEN, YOU LITTLE SHIT! YOU CAME FROM ME! I AM A PART OF YOU, AND YOU ARE A PART OF ME! YOU WILL ALWAYS BE NOTHING BUT A WHINY, SELFISH SOCIOPATH!”
The black figure threw Anima off what was probably a steel railing, and Anima fell down into a deep abyss of water with a giant splash.
Anima just sank down below, her clothes all wet, completely in the void until-
…
She woke up- wet. What a horrible way to start the day.
…
“When the fuck are our school schedules coming in?!” Riley asked angrily at lunch time, “School’s fixin’ to start in four days! Shit!”
Riley’s best friend, Marilyn Cheong, was sitting next to her even though she technically wasn’t supposed to. “Damn, you guys still haven’t got yours? ‘Cause I got mine, like, a week ago.”
“No, and I’m starting to think that it’s because we’re group home kids,” Riley answered.
Anima looked at Riley and Marilyn; she forgot about school starting soon. She wondered which school she was going to, and she wondered who else she was going to school with. She looked at Kishi, who was playing Uno with Marcus, Ryu-jin, and Minha. Anima hoped that she and Kishi were gonna be in the same classes.
“Well, damn,” Marilyn said, “Where the fuck you guys gonna go if you guys don’t get your schedules?”
Riley snorted and laughed.
Anima looked up again. Not getting schedules before the first day of school? Was that possible? Apparently not because as soon as Faustine came back inside from checking the mail, she plopped down a bunch of white envelopes that came from the Nach Cuma School District. Anima frantically searched through the envelopes and quickly zoomed off as soon as she found her name on one of them.
“Thank you, you God damn Fantasy!” Riley shouted at Faustine.
“Fantasy” rolled her eyes. “Can you please not call me that?”
“Aight, however-the-fuck-I’m-supposed-to-pronounce-your-name!” Marilyn shouted.
Riley and Marilyn started shrieking their asses off in laughter for several minutes until Marilyn stopped and told Riley to let her see her schedule. So Riley did.
NACH CUMA PUBLIC SCHOOLS
Wilson, Riley Homeroom: Alvarado, Ramona Grade: 10A01: English II- Coyle, Jennifer C107A02: Credit Recovery- Hayes, Latrice F100A03: Physical Science- Jones, Scott B217A04: World History- Adams, Waldo C202B05: Geometry- Laurel, Kate B113B06: Spanish II- Lopez, Juan C133B07: Health/PE- Kinney, Lily GymB08: Psychology- Pham, Duc Mihn C204
“Damn, girl! You still in the tenth grade?!” Marilyn practically shouted.
Riley blushed. “Bitch, you ain’t much better than me!” she exclaimed, snatching Marilyn’s schedule.
NACH CUMA PUBLIC SCHOOLS
Cheong, Marilyn Homeroom: Bell, Lori Grade: 12 Rank: 235/250A01: Algebra II- Schatz, Anna B123A02: Credit Recovery- Hayes, Latrice F100A03: Physical Science- Reed, Karen B215A04: Art I- Fisenko, Julia C218B05: English IV- Brenner, Linda C108B06: Government/Economics- Brown, Amber C203B07: Spanish I- Alvarado, Ramona C132B08: Drama II- Gould, Iris Music 3
“Oh would you look at that!” Riley exclaimed, “We’re both in the same Credit Recovery class! I wonder what the fuck that’s for!”
“It’s ’cause I need Human Anatomy to graduate nigga, damn,” Marilyn answered quietly.
Just then, Greg came downstairs into the kitchen with Niklas. Niklas was wearing a dark gray sweater and had bags under his eyes.
“Mr. Maxwell!” Marilyn loudly exclaimed, waving her hands around like a dumb ass.
Mr. Maxwell, who was just Greg, walked over to where Riley and Marilyn were sitting. “Aren’t you supposed to be somewhere else right now?”
“Yeah, but guess what rank I’m at!” Marilyn said.
“What rank are you at?”
“235!”
“Out of…?”
“250!”
That piqued Ryan’s interest. “235 out 250?! Damn, you’re dumb as fuck!” he shouted.
“Aight, motherfucker. I wanna see you do better!” Riley shouted back.
So Ryan took out his schedule.
NACH CUMA PUBLIC SCHOOLS
Crenshaw, Ryan Homeroom: Needham, Elizabeth Grade: 12 Rank: 134/250A01: Algebra II- Buchanan, Joseph B124A02: PE/Health- Waites, Eaton GymA03: Human Anatomy- Moore, Skylor B220A04: Government/Economics- Clark, Lance C200B05: English IV- Brenner, Linda C108B06: Art II- Felice, Carly C217B07: Nutrition- Salem, Dallas B125B08: Psychology- Pham, Duc Mihn C204
“Damn,” Marilyn said quietly, “You proved your point.”
Niklas, who was just staring at the trio just acting like dumb little shits, said, “What is this, a dick-measuring contest? None of you gave a shit about class ranking last year, and now all of a sudden it’s the most important thing in the whole world?”
“Motherfucker, some of us actually want to have a good education!” Riley said to Niklas.
Niklas snorted, rolled his eyes, and handed his schedule to Riley, Marilyn, and Ryan.
NACH CUMA PUBLIC SCHOOLS
Giuliani-Rosenberg, Niklas Homeroom: Pham, Duc Mihn Grade: 11A01: Geometry- Laurel, Kate B113A02: Nutrition- Salem, Dallas B125A03: Physical Science- Jones, Scott B217A04: PE/Health- Waites, Eaton GymB05: English III- Self, Cody C121B06: Psychology- Pham, Duc Mihn C204B07: Spanish I- Alvarado, Ramona C132B08: US History- Little, Rose C200
“Oh, hell no!” Riley shouted, “I can’t believe I got Physical Science with you!”
Niklas just rolled his eyes again and snatched his schedule back.
“Hol’ up!” Marilyn exclaimed, snatching Niklas’s schedule again, “I got Spanish I with this motherfucker!”
“So, do you speak any Mexican?” Ryan asked Marilyn and Niklas, “Because I heard this bitch doesn’t let you speak any other language than that!”
A little girl from across the table coughed.
“It’s true,” Riley added, “She don’t let you speak any damn English, not even in Spanish I. Thank God I got Mr. Lopez instead.”
Marilyn looked around a bit. “I don’t speak any Mexican,” she said quietly.
The little girl coughed a little more. This time, everyone looked at her and noticed that it was Cereza Cordova, who was drawing a picture of the Vocaloid Hatsune Miku.
Then Cereza went back to drawing her picture.
Marilyn got out of her chair, put both her arms around Niklas and Ryan, and asked-
“I mean, damn! You guys never tell me anything!” Marilyn added. She rubbed her left hand on Ryan’s biceps, then on his chest.
Ryan pulled away. “Get off, bitch! I have a girlfriend!” he told her.
“And she’s a sophomore in high school. How’d that happen?” Riley muttered under her breath.
Ryan heard that. “Yeah, bitch. I think you might have the same classes as her then!”
“Oh, shit!” Marilyn screamed with laughter. She fell to the ground.
“Man, shut ya’ll asses up!” Riley shouted as Ryan started laughing his ass off as well.
Just then, Greg returned with Piro from upstairs and asked just what was going on.
“These two keep making fun of me for something I can’t help,” Riley said, pointing at Marilyn and Ryan.
While Marilyn kept on laughing like she was high on crack, Ryan objected. “Oh, bullshit! You can help not being a dumb lazy bitch!”
Marilyn laughed so loudly that Piro had to cry and cover his ears.
“Okay, Marilyn. I think it’s time to go home,” Greg said.
“Bye, Marilyn,” Riley said.
“Yeah, bye bitch!” Ryan said.
Marilyn coughed out one last laugh and shouted out, “Bye!” as she left the YouChannell Home.
…
Anima and Kishi were lying down on the living room floor staring at the ceiling. It was right before bedtime.
“I’m scared,” Anima said.
“Of what?” Kishi asked.
Anima sighed. “I don’t know… I guess I’m scared-” Anima said this last part quietly “-my mom and dad are gonna find out where I’m at.”
“Why do you say that?”
Anima didn’t want to recall the nightmare she had last night.
“Oh,” Kishi said quietly, “I get it now.”
“What the hell am I gonna do, Kish?! I don’t know how I’m gonna cope and deal, and what if the other people find out and-”
“It’s okay, Anima,” Kishi said, “I think we have the same classes together.”
Anima looked at Kishi longingly. “You really think that?”
Kishi nodded. “Yeah… I’m pretty sure we have most of the same classes together.”
That calmed Anima down. She smiled at Kishi’s hair and was happy to have Kishi with her. She wished they could be together forever.
Anima Hatsune and Ryu-jin Nohara were outside in the backyard.
Niklas angrily glared at Anima and yelled, “Will you quit fucking kicking the ball against the fucking door?!”
Anima was indignant. “I’m just practicing for the kickball game.”
Niklas threw his hands up in the air. “What kickball game?!”
“You know… the kickball game me and Shibi are planning at one o’ clock.”
Just then, Niklas and Ryu-jin sneakily gazed over the next-door fence and saw Shibi kicking a Tigger ball. But apparently the boys were really shitty stealths because Shibi eventually turned her head and stared at the pair.
“Shit!” Ryu-jin exclaimed in a whisper and ran towards Anima, “She caught us!”
Anima decided to march up towards Shibi’s backyard fence and asked what time their kickball game was.
“One o’ clock!” Shibi exclaimed, still kicking her ball.
“Sorry, what time?” Anima shouted just to be an asshole towards Ryu-jin and Niklas.
“One ‘o clock!” Shibi repeated more loudly.
Anima smirked at the two boys. “Looks like the game’s starting at one.”
Ryu-jin just simply walked back into the house; Niklas, however, rolled his eyes and groaned, “Fuck me.”
…
It was around 12:30 in the afternoon, and Anima was getting quite desperate. She needed to recruit some team members quickly before Shibi got the last laugh. So she decided to hook up Marcus Yusuf.
“Hey, Marcus,” Anima started, “You wanna join me in a game of kickball?”
“It’s at one.”
Marcus and Anima shook hands. “You’re on!”
Anima beamed and skipped over towards Ryu-jin’s twin sister Minha, who was sitting a periwinkle recliner.
“Hey, Minha,” Anima began, “You wanna join me and Marcus in a game of kickball?”
Minha rolled her eyes. “What for?”
“Because if you do, I’ll give you five bucks… and that Avril Lavigne CD Kishi got me last Christmas.”
Minha thought about that offer for a good solid moment before finally caving in and answering with-
“Gotcha! Do you want me to get you the CD and the five bucks now or after the game?”
“Now, duh!” Minha rolled her eyes again.
Anima stepped back a bit. “Game starts at one though.”
“I’m not waiting until one o’ clock!”
“Well, you’re gonna have to because the fucking game doesn’t start until one o’ clock! So that’s that!”
Minha stuck her nose up in the air. “Fine then. I’m not playing.”
“Okay. Then you don’t get my five dollars or the Avril Lavigne CD!” With that out of the way, Anima stormed off to the kitchen. It really burned that Minha was being such a spoiled little bitch about the Avril Lavigne CD because Anima didn’t even really like Avril Lavigne. She sighed.
“What seems to be the problem, Anima?” Greg asked because of course he had to get into everyone’s business.
Anima sighed again and glared at Greg. “Me and Shibi are having this kickball game at one today, and I can’t find anyone to be on my team.”
Greg stepped back. “You and Shibi are having what now?”
“A kickball game, why? Am I not allowed to play a simple game with my next-door neighbor?!”
“No, I’m not saying that. In fact, I’m very proud of you for playing with Shibi again. Just… well… next time, I just want you to tell me next time, alright?”
Huh. That was it? All Greg did was just tell Anima to tell him about future playdates with Shibi. He didn’t actually yell at her for setting up a game of kickball. Anima quickly glanced at Greg again; this time he was talking to Tessa. Shit, what was it? She stretched her ears and listened extra hard.
“Tessa, would you mind playing kickball with Anima and Shibi?”
Tessa thought about it before answering-
“It’s today at one.”
“…Isn’t that a bit sudden?”
Greg nodded. “I wish she had told me about this earlier, but at least she’s playing with Shibi without anyone making her do so.”
Tessa looked around. “Yeah… I guess you have a point.”
Then Greg looked at Tessa and got a “great” idea. “Why don’t you talk to Anima about this game?”
Tessa was a little uncertain about this; Anima could be kind of a bitch. However, she wanted to make a good impression not just on Greg but on Anima as well. So she reluctantly walked over to Anima and sat down in a chair next to her. “So erhm… I hear you’re organizing a kickball game today at one.”
Anima looked up. “Yeah, and?”
“And I was wondering if I can play too.”
That made Anima perk up. “You mean you’ll play on my team?!” she squealed.
Tessa pushed back her chair. “Team?” she gulped, “I thought we were just playing against each other.”
“Yeah, I was just recruiting for my team.” And as if that wasn’t enough, Anima gave Tessa a smug smirk.
That was when Tessa slowly stood up and walked out of the kitchen.
…
Everyone was eating tuna sandwiches for lunch at 12:48 P.M. when someone knocked on the door.
“I wonder who that can be?” Katja wondered aloud before opening the door. It turned out to be Shibi’s dad Mr. Kuroi and Shibi.
“Hey there, neighbor~!” Mr. Kuroi chirped, “So how about that kickball game this afternoon?”
“It’s this kickball game me and Shibi are having today at one,” Anima answered.
Katja went from confused to a tad bit pissed off. “And how long have you and Shibi been planning this?”
Anima shrugged. “I think it’s been about two weeks.”
“Two weeks?!” Greg exclaimed, “You and Shibi have been planning this for two weeks?!”
“…Oh, my God,” Katja said quietly to herself.
…
Everyone at the YouChannell Group Home was outside near the playground at one o’clock. Anima still hadn’t gotten all of her teammates yet, but apparently Greg said that both she and Shibi were gonna have to wait until everyone was here. Anima couldn’t see how many more people were gonna arrive. So she turned to Kishi.
“Hey, Kish,” Anima began, “If I still get to be captain, would you like to be on my team?”
“So? You don’t have to be good at kickball to be on my team,” Anima reassured.
Kishi looked at Anima all confused and strangely comforted. “Do you really mean that?”
“Sure I do! Why wouldn’t I?”
A little while later, Mr. Kuroi and Shibi arrived at the field with a round scarlet ball.
“So are these the only people playing our game today?” Mr. Kuroi asked.
Greg was about to answer, but Shibi tugged on her father’s shirttail and told him that three more people were to play.
“Oh…” Mr. Kuroi said, “Oh, okay then. Well who else is coming?”
As if to answer his question, two girls (one with shoulder-length blonde hair and another with long red hair) came running along onto the field.
“We’re here now!” the blonde girl shouted.
Riley turned around as soon as the blonde girl shouted that. “Oh, shit,” she groaned.
“What?” Anima asked.
“Who the fuck thought that this was a great idea?” Riley groaned again.
“Oh, Jesus, we’re going to hell for this, aren’t we?” Tamie groaned along.
What Riley and Tamie were referring to was why in the hell Charlotte and her little sister Sabina Johannsson were invited to play kickball.
Charlotte was the short blonde one. Many people in the YouChannell Group Home, especially Riley, hated her because she was smug and thought she was so much better than those in the YouChannell Group Home because she didn’t live in a group home and she attended honors classes in school and she was on the track team. She was fast and pretty good at sports.
Sabina was the tall girl with the red hair. Originally, she was born in Russia, but the Johannssons adopted her, and just like that, she became just like them, except for the fact that she was sassier and a bit smarter than Charlotte. She was even faster and extremely good at sports, and that was what everyone at the YouChannell Group Home feared.
“Sorry we’re late!” Charlotte panted as she slowed down, “I had to take care of Hoa.” Hoa was Charlotte’s other little sister adopted from Vietnam.
“I wish you had stayed behind and taken care of your little sister, little bitch,” Riley grumbled under her breath.
Too bad Charlotte heard that. “I heard that, Riley Wilson!” she exclaimed.
“Heard what?” Riley played dumb.
“That part about staying at home taking care of a baby! Just because I’m a girl doesn’t mean that all I’m useful is staying at home and taking care of kids!”
“I didn’t even imply that, and even if I did, you wouldn’t have even heard about it if you didn’t fucking eavesdrop on me!”
“Damn, are you two just gonna argue the entire game?” Sabina groaned in exasperation.
Charlotte huffed. “You’re right,” she admitted, “So, tell me who’s gonna be on whose team.”
“There’s still one more person that needs to come,” Anima pointed out.
Riley and Charlotte yelled in agony.
“Who is it?” Kishi asked.
“I’m here now!” a little girl’s voice pierced the skies.
Everyone turned their heads to see a small little girl wearing a pretty magenta dress and black Mary Janes. They also saw Mrs. Kuroi running behind her.
“Bitty?!” Kishi exclaimed almost too loudly, “But she’s only three years old!”
Anima pointed towards Shibi, Bitty, Mrs. Kuroi, and Mr. Kuroi hugging and loving on Bitty.
“Happy Birthday, Bitty!” Mrs. Kuroi cheered, kissing her youngest daughter on the cheek.
“Oh, it’s her birthday today,” Kishi said.
Greg walked up to the Kurois. “Happy Birthday, Bitty!” he cheered her on.
“Guess what!” Bitty exclaimed, “I’m this many years old!” She held up four fingers to show Greg how many years old she was.
“That’s great!” Greg exclaimed.
Pretty soon, Mr. Kuroi whistled on a whistle and announced that now was the time for the captains to pick their teammates. This was the final list:
Captain: Anima Captain: Shibi
Ryu-jin Nohara Charlotte Johannsson
Niklas Giuliani Sabina Johannsson
Marcus YusufTessa Wilkinson
Kishi Sayaka Ami Wilkinson
Tamie EspositoPiro Yan
Ryan Crenshaw Riley Wilson
Axel ErikssonMinha Nohara
Bitty Kuroi Cereza Cordova
Referee: Faustine Louis
Anima was pretty disappointed to see that a four-year-old was on her team, but at least she didn’t have to deal with Ami, who was suggesting to Shibi that they name their team Team Amazon after one of the teams from Total Drama World Tour.
Bitty, however, was excited to play with all the big boys and girls. She ran up to Marcus and Kishi and gleefully exclaimed, “Guess what! I’m this many years old today!” She held up four fingers to show how many years old she was.
“That’s great!” Kishi exclaimed back.
“Happy Birthday!” Marcus exclaimed as well.
Anima, however, didn’t wanna wish Bitty a happy birthday. She walked over to Shibi and asked if she could switch Bitty with someone else. Shibi shook her head no.
“Aw, come on!” Anima pleaded, “I’ll trade you Bitty with Piro!”
Still, Shibi shook her head no.
Anima turned to Greg. “Come on, Greg!” Anima whined, “Can’t me and Shibi switch members just this one time?!”
“No,” Greg answered, “What you get is what you get.”
Anima huffed. There was no hope, and nobody was gonna compromise. So she walked back to her team and scowled.
“So who’s going to kick first?” Mr. Kuroi asked.
Both Anima and Shibi pointed at each other at the same time; neither of them was gonna take no for an answer.
Greg sighed through his nose. “I guess we’re gonna have to play ‘Rock, Paper, Scissors’,” he mumbled to Mr. Kuroi.
“Guess so,” Mr. Kuroi mumbled back.
So the girls played “Rock, Paper, Scissors”; Anima’s team was to kick first.
“Damn it!” Anima exclaimed, “I want a rematch!”
“No rematches,” Greg replied, “We’re only doing this ‘Rock, Paper, Scissors’ thing once.” Then he pointed to home base where Sabina was being umpire.
“Aw,” Anima muttered as she dragged her feet to where the rest of her team was.
Everyone on Anima’s team looked at each other with great shame and embarrassment.
“So who’s kicking first?” Niklas asked.
More staring and looking at each other with great shame and embarrassment.
“I guess I’ll go first,” Marcus suggested. That was fair because Marcus was the type of guy to volunteer to kick a ball for the team.
Shibi rolled the ball hard, and it was hard to admit it but she was a good roller. Marcus, however, was just as good as kicking as Shibi was rolling. He ended up at second base.
Anima turned around and beamed. “Who’s next?”
Nobody stepped forward; they didn’t want to jinx their luck. This went on for like two minutes until finally Ryu-jin was forced to be next.
The scarlet ball rolled again. This time, everyone on the team was anticipating it. Closer and closer it came, and Ryu-jin kicked it- but it was too late.
“Strike!” Sabina Johannsson, who was the umpire, screeched at the top of her lungs.
Ryu-jin looked around and noticed that the ball was in the umpire’s hands. What the fuck had just happened?
“You dumb ass!” Anima shouted, “You were supposed to kick the ball!”
“Anima, language!” Greg warned her from afar.
“Yeah, Anima. Language!” Ryu-jin echoed. Then he added in his head, “Bitch.”
The ball started rolling again. This time, Ryu-jin managed to kick the ball all the way to third base; he only ran to first. Marcus ran to third and managed to barely make it in safely.
“Right, who’s next?” Anima asked.
Everyone looked around; they didn’t want to jinx their luck.
“Why don’t we play ‘Not It’?” Kishi suggested.
Actually, that didn’t sound like a bad idea. “Not it!” everyone shouted except for Kishi because she was too late.
“Wait a minute! I was just joking, guys!” Kishi exclaimed as Anima and Niklas pushed her towards home base.
“Too late,” Anima merely and rather heartlessly said.
Too late indeed. There was Kishi, small and alone on home base, face to face with a merciless Shibi Kuroi. Well, maybe Shibi wouldn’t be so ruthless. Maybe she would be fair.
…That, unfortunately, was wishful thinking. Shibi, just like she would anyone else, rolled the ball hard, like real hard, and Kishi missed.
“Strike!” Sabina the umpire shouted.
Kishi blushed and focused on the ball. Rolling, rolling, rolling, kicking, kicking-
“Strike!”
Again? Kishi took some deep breaths to prevent herself from crying. She focused on the ball one more time. Surely she would actually kick the ball.
“Strike!” Sabina shouted once more.
“Oh, bullshit!” Anima shouted back, “That wasn’t a strike! That was a foul!”
“No, it wasn’t. It was a strike!” Sabina shouted at Anima.
“Fuck you! You don’t know what a strike is!” Anima shouted back at Sabina.
And then Greg had to be involved. “What’s this about a strike?”
“Sabina’s been yelling ‘Strike’ at Kishi, and it wasn’t a strike! It was a foul!” Anima explained.
“It’s a strike, and you damn well know it! You’re only saying that ’cause it’s your bestie I’m striking out!” Sabina argued.
Greg turned to Kishi. “Did you strike out or was this a foul?”
“I can’t tell a lie,” Kishi said, “I… I striked out.”
Sabina laughed her ass off.
“What?!” Anima screamed.
“I told you! I told you!” Sabina yelled in a shriek of laughter.
“Okay, so it was a strike,” Greg said, “So that means that Kishi is out.”
Kishi looked at Anima. “I’m sorry, Anima,” she said as she walked towards the back.
Tamie put her hands on the girl’s shoulders. “Don’t worry, kid. At least you didn’t fall on your ass like I would’ve,” she said.
Kishi looked at Tamie with utter confusion. “What do you mean?”
Kishi wasn’t the only one who heard Tamie’s statement. “Yeah, what do you mean by that statement?” Anima asked in suspicion.
“Why the fuck are you eavesdropping?!” Tamie inquired angrily.
“Don’t act like you’re not gonna play ball because you think you suck at it!” Anima exclaimed, ignoring Tamie’s question.
“Why the fuck are you eavesdropping?!” Tamie inquired more angrily and louder.
Anima tried to push the fat cow towards home base. “All team members have to do their share in order for the team as a whole to win,” Anima grunted, “So you’re going to kick the fucking ball whether you want to or not!”
And that was when Anima, Niklas, and even Kishi mercilessly pushed Tamie towards home base. Tamie was shouting and and swearing all the way, and there she was. Right in front of Shibi fucking Kuroi. The best fucking rodeo cowgirl in the whole God damn world.
The first roll was approaching. Tamie braced herself for a kick, but it was all for nothing because she fell flat on her ass as the ball rolled past by.
“Strike!” Sabina the umpire shouted.
Tamie slowly got up. She brushed her pants and tried again… with the same result.
“Strike!” Sabina shouted again.
“Wow, she really is worse than me,” Kishi thought to herself.
Tamie stumbled back up for one more kick. Bracing herself, she faced the pitcher once more. The ball started rolling again, Tamie dragged her foot on the ground, and…
“Strike!” Sabina shouted once more.
Wow. Their second out. One more and they were fucked. The team needed someone not just competent, but really really good because they had two guys on other bases and they needed to get home.
“Right, so who’s next?” Anima asked.
Nobody stepped forward. Niklas was starting to get pissed.
“Come on, folks! I don’t have time for this shit!”
Still no one came forward.
“I can’t believe it!” Anima screamed, stomping her foot, “So much for the lot of-“
That was when Niklas snapped. “I have an idea,” he suggested, pushing the team captain towards home base, “How about YOU kick for once in your life?!”
And there was Anima, face to face with her worst fucking nightmare. She prayed that Shibi would go easy on her, but no. Shibi was a hard ass motherfucker, and she was gonna roll that motherfucking ball as hard as motherfucking wanted to. So she did… and Anima missed.
“Strike!” Sabina the umpire shouted.
“What the fuck?!” Anima objected, “That wasn’t a strike! That was a foul!”
“No, that was a strike!” Sabina argued back.
“No, it wasn’t!”
“Yes, it was!”
“Anima, that was a strike,” Greg said.
“Ha!” Sabina shouted, “Told ya!”
Anima rolled her eyes and focused on the scarlet ball once again. Rolling, rolling, rolling-
“Strike!” Sabina shouted again.
“What the fuck?!” Anima screeched like a banshee.
“I told you it was a strike,” Sabina merely and flatly said.
Anima huffed and once again turned to Shibi. Please please please go easy. Easy… easy… easy…
“Strike!” Sabina shouted once more.
“Fuck!” Anima screamed.
Tamie turned to Niklas. “Jesus, this girl is worse than I am.”
“How the fuck did she become captain again?” Niklas muttered.
The teams switched places. Suddenly, Niklas was the pitcher, Ryu-jin was at first base, Marcus at second, Kishi at third, Anima was the shortstop, and Tamie was the umpire. Piro was the first person to kick. Ami didn’t think it was a good idea, but Sabina thought it would be funny as fuck.
Niklas, not rolling nearly as hard as Shibi, rolled just hard enough to get a strike. He did not get a strike because Piro managed to kick the ball hard enough to go to second.
“Come on, Piro!” his entire team shouted at him in excitement and encouragement.
Well, this jackass must’ve never played kickball before because he didn’t run a single step, even with the encouragement of his teammates. That was when Sabina got a great idea.
“YOU WANNA BE AN AIRFORCE RANGER!” she sang offkey at the top of her lungs.
Piro didn’t move worth a shit.
“YOU WANNA LIVE A LIFE OF DANGER!” Sabina continued on.
Still, Piro didn’t move an inch. By that point, even the opposing was getting restless. This would’ve been an easy out for them, but how was this supposed to be fun? To help out (and to amusement themselves)-
“YOU DON’T WANNA GET RAPED BY STRANGERS!” Anima hollered on key as loudly as possible.
But even that didn’t get Piro running (despite the protests from Kishi, Charlotte, Tessa, and especially Ami and the grownups). Oh, well. Time to go for the last resort.
“THINK OF A BIG BLACK MAN CHASING YOU!” Anima yelled in her cupped hands. She laughed to herself at that funny joke.
“Hey!” Marcus whined over the protests of everyone (except maybe Sabina and Ryu-jin).
At least that statement finally made Piro run, where he was tagged out at second base by Marcus.
“Well, he’s not racist,” Anima said more to herself than to anyone else.
“No, but you are,” Tessa retorted back, giving the opposing captain the evil eye.
Next up at home base was Charlotte, which made Niklas gulp in fear. Charlotte was a member of the school’s softball team, so she knew a thing or two about batting and running. So, Niklas rolled the ball as hard as he could, but it was no use. Charlotte kicked the ball just as hard as Niklas had rolled it and made it to third base. While her team was cheering, Tamie and Sabina were discussing Full House of all things.
“Full House was my shit growing up,” Tamie told Sabina, licking her lips, “You ever watched the show in Italian?”
“Dude, I’m from Russia,” Sabina answered. She scratched her leg for a little bit before asking, “Is Uncle Jesse as dreamy in the Italian version as he is in the American version?”
“Hell if I know,” Tamie said. She smiled in a lovesick way and added, “What I do know is that DJ got hot in the later seasons.”
Sabina looked back with a baffled look on her face as she did a double-take. “You mean the girl character?”
Meanwhile, Tessa and Bitty were trying to convince Shibi to kick the ball next.
“No, you stiffed me at Olive Garden,” Shibi declined in a faux African accent.
“Olive Garden?” Tessa asked, looking over at Bitty, hoping to get some sort of context.
“She’s just repeating what she heard from a video at you guys’ house yesterday,” Bitty merely said.
Oh. Tessa knew who played that video yesterday as she glared at Anima and Piro. But, to get the game back in motion, she apologized to Shibi for stiffing her at Olive Garden.
“Then let our powers combine,” Shibi announced, still with the faux Afican accent. As she ran towards home base, she shouted out, “GO PLANET!”
Well, Shibi may had been a good runner, but she was a shit kicker because she kicked the ball right back at the pitcher (who caught the ball) all three times.
“Holy shit is she bad,” Anima said quietly as she watched Shibi get some pity encouragement from her teammates.
Ryu-jin snorted. “Yeah, like you’re one to talk,” he replied.
Anima gave him the evil and the middle finger.
Up next was Tessa. Stretching, she posed for her very best kicking abilities… which ended up being a-
“FOUL!” Tamie the umpire hollered, trying hard not to snicker.
Tessa blushed a bright pink as she and Niklas the pitcher looked over to where the scarlet ball was. Turned out it was a few feet away from where Anima the shortstop (captain) was standing.
“Get the ball!” Niklas shouted at the captain, “Get the fucking ball!”
Anima placed her hands on her hips and complained, “Don’t you know how far away that ball is?! Why can’t someone else get it?!”
“Oh, for fuck’s-” At that point, Niklas’s face was as scarlet as the ball he needed as he marched up towards Anima and hollered right in her face, “YOU ARE THE MOST USELESS FUCKING CAPTAIN I HAVE EVER DEALT WITH! HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU ABLE TO BOSS EVERYONE ELSE AROUND, BUT WHEN WE TELL YOU TO DO SOMETHING, YOU GET PISSY AND-“
“Holy shit, dude!” Ryu-jin exclaimed above the cries and protests in shock and horror, covering his balls.
Niklas stumbled to the ground in dire pain, holding onto his crotch for dear life. Tears stung his eyes, but, despite the intense pain he was in and the feeling of passing out, he wouldn’t let them fall. Greg and Mr. Kuroi ran towards the two, holding back Anima and helping Niklas up to his feet respectively.
“Alright, game over!” Greg announced loudly, “If we can’t play nice, then we’re not going to play at all!”
So, who won? No one. They’d traded deaths, Team One and Team Two, and neither had won. Both had lost.
ManictheMod 